YOUR CAR
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WHAT DRIVING TO THE STORE WOULD BE LIKE IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN
YOUR CAR

MS-DOS 
       You get in the car and try to remember where you put your keys. 
Windows 
       You get in the car and drive to the store very slowly, because attached to the 
back of the car is a freight train. 
Macintosh System 7 
       You get in the car to go to the store. The car drives you to church instead, 
because the store has mysteriously exploded. 
UNIX 
       You get in the car and type GREP STORE. You screech off at 200 miles per hour 
and arrive at the barber shop. 
Windows NT 
       You get in the car and write a letter that says "go to the store." Then you get 
out of the car and mail the letter to your dashboard. 
Taligent/Pink 
       You walk to the store with Ricardo Montalban, who tells you how wonderful it 
will be when he can fly you to the store in his Learjet. 
Amiga 
       You get in the car and tell it to go to the store. It takes you to a shopping 
mall on the Moon. 
Apple 
       As you set out for the store, a hurricane comes up. The streets flood and the 
windshield wipers quit. You wash up in front of a store on a
       desert island in the South Pacific. 
VAX 
       You get in the car and find that the controls are all labeled in Egyptian 
hieroglyphics. You press several buttons at random and suddenly find
       yourself parked in front of a store, next to an Apple. 
OS/2 
       After fueling up with 6,000 gallons of gas, you get in the car and drive to the 
store with a motorcycle escort and a marching band in
       procession. Halfway there, the car blows up, killing you and half the town. 
S/36 SSP [mainframe, obviously] 
       You get in the car and drive to the store. Halfway there you run out of gas. 
While walking the rest of the way, you are run over by kids on
       mopeds. 
AS/400 
       An attendant locks you into the car and then drives you to the store, where you 
get to watch everybody else buy filet mignons. 

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