Bob, thanks for a peek behind the curtain. Short comment below:
--- In [email protected], Bob Price <bobpriced@...> wrote: . One of the reasons I left the movement was that I > just couldn't keep mustering the "cognitive dissonance" required to give the > "improved social behaviour" part of the intro and be honest with myself about my > own behaviour and the behaviour of the many initiators I knew. Not exactly related, but my "moment" came at Livingston Manor around 1977 or 78 when I got interviewed by Reed Martin for going on a "mission" to Zambia. I was rejected, for relating what was a pretty good experience, but one which I guess scared him. And at that moment I realized I had to leave. I went to NYC with no money. My parents wired me some money but for some reason it was too late for the Western Union office to get it. There was a women there who saw that I was "homeless" for the moment and offered to let me stay in her apartment. It was tiny and terribly cluttered, and she had what I recall was a big dog. I found a place to bed down on a large chair. I left early in the morning, and traveled back home. And yes, I have come to realize that it is only by rigorous (and unflinching) self examination that one can make progress on the spirtiual path. But I have also found that the practice of meditation has helped lubricate that process. I don't feel bitterness towards my time in TMO, partly becasuse I don't think that I ever bought into that notion that "meditate and everything would fall into place". But like you I found the eastern schools of thought and POVs fascinating, (and still do for that matter), but I have ceased following a teacher, or ascribing to a particular "teaching". Net, Net, my experience in TMO is one I wouldn't trade. I could elaborate more, but think I'll stop here.
