--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Ravi Chivukula <chivukula.ravi@...> wrote: > > Oh wow, this must be hard. what do the doctors say Xeno, do they have > anything definitive, how long must you suffer like this? Goddammit why > can't they just say it, two choices - how hard can it be, either a > sociopath or a psychopath.
Ravi, I have been reading about sociopaths and psychopaths recently. I do not suffer and I am not a sociopath, but what you said is germane to the issue because I think I do have some traits that I share with sociopaths. Maybe I am about a third of the way there. Some of these traits intensified with meditation. The only person that has been on this forum that I would suspect of being a sociopath is Robin Carlsen, but I am not in a position to make a believable diagnosis; would prefer to leave that to professionals. The following article is said to be written by a diagnosed sociopath, who used the pseudonym "M.E. Thomas". I am curious what you think of this person. http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201305/confessions-sociopath I am also interested in the experience or experiences you had 3-4 years ago, your 'awakening'. Some 40 and more years ago I had some experiences that I would have called awakening, though now I would call them 'openings'. Some were, were I religious, simply divine. If I had been suckered into a religion, they surly would have been a conversion experience. Then I went through a period lasting maybe seven years of expansion, followed by decades of what I would call a dark night, then a real awakening, the character of which was quite different than those earlier experiences, though the early experiences had a grain of clarity, but not nearly as much as I had thought at the time they occurred. For me those early experiences were ecstatic, while the latter had a profound and utter ordinariness, a complete lack of any hint of the spectacular. It is that you seem to have had a very profound and ecstatic experience, but now perhaps more reflective about it, maybe wondering how things will unfold from here. I assure you this is not something I can help you with, it is something you are on your own here. You seem to have moments of deep reflection and moments of near insantity. How do you fit these together?
