Some of my favourite lines from "Withnail and I" (which I just saw 
on DVD for about the 5th time...some great extras, by the way):

--------

Monty: As a youth I used to weep in butcher's shops. 

---------

Monty: Flowers are simply tarts; prostitutes for the bees. 

---------

[about a chicken] 
Peter Marwood: I think you should strangle it quickly before it 
starts trying to make friends with us. 

-----------

Peter Marwood: I have just narrowly avoided having a buggering, and 
have come in here with the express intention of wishing one upon 
you. 

------------

Monty: Come on lads, let's get home, the sky's beginning to bruise, 
night must fall and we shall be forced to camp. 

------------

Uncle Monty: Tell him if you must, I no longer care. I mean to have 
you even if it must be burglary. 

------------

Danny: I don't advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the 
employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials. They pick up 
signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. 
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight. 





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