10 Most Bitchin' Reasons California Becoming Its Own Country Would Be
So Cool

    * Four words: Vice President Nancy Pelosi.

    * State and local legislatures already extremely comfortable
setting foreign policy.

    * Our own armed services. Eastwood, Schwarzenegger, Stallone or
Willis in charge?

    * Opening weekend foreign distribution movie figures go way up.

    * You want a war. I got a war for you. We invade Florida for
orange juice supremacy. Then take on Wisconsin for that whole cheese
deal. Then France. For the wine? No, for the hell of it. Because now
it's in our blood.

    * Our own intelligence agency. Imagine the allure of an assignment
to one of our undercover cells in Reno.

    * Can extradite and convict Enron CEO, Ken Lay, at our own war
crimes tribunal.

    * We charge a fee on every foreigner trying out as a contestant on
"Wheel of Fortune." Call it a stupid tax.

    * Bechtel (a California based concern) builds a Great Wall right
down the middle of Lake Tahoe. Screw the corner. Straight line. North
to south.

    * We outlaw Fox News as a foreign propaganda tool.

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