--- In [email protected], TurquoiseB <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > For a long time I've been of the belief that there are > few people on earth who would benefit more from the > practice of mindfulness than Judy Stein. Reading Vaj's > post about the recent experiments in which mindfulness > changed brain function reinforced that belief for me. > > Take the example used in that well-written article. When > a person sees an angry face -- even if it's flashed at > them subliminally, too fast for them to recognize con- > sciously -- the brain reacts by going into fight or > flight response. For some reason I do not understand, > Judy has a tendency to see angry faces where I do not > perceive them to be. <snip>
Bingo! I think this is the crux of it right here. Back around 2002 when I yet had a good bit of unresolved anger toward MMY and the TMO, but was not particularly aware of that anger on the surface, and thought I was making logical, helpful, reasonable posts, Judy often ate me for lunch. :-) Since then, over time, I've paid a lot of attention to my old MMY/TMO wounds, and watched a lot of them heal. This doesn't mean I have assumed or resumed a true-believer stance w/r/t MMY and the TMO. My "program" has continued to dissolve and morph beyond all recognition and description, becoming entirely spontaneous and self-directed, moment to moment. While I enjoy some aspects of Stapathya-veda, I chose to buy a great Victorian house with a lovely south entrance, only 4 blocks from FF's square. I moved to FF (again) primarily because of the love and companionship I feel for the Wednesday-night Satsangers; I had no abiding interest in MUM, the TMO or the Domes. I don't use MAPI herbs or Ayurveda. I'm not a great fan of Jyotish, although I've seen in the hands of an intuitive practitioner it can work healing wonders, like any other richly complex language. (My wife and I were most impressed with Shastri- ji.) I don't particularly believe or disbelieve in MMY's old SofC model, having in turn (1) swallowed it whole, (2) seen it as a fairy- tale construct of a single indivisible SofC, (3) had fun dividing C up into other models of my own, and (4) been blown away last year by far deeper understanding of, and congruence between, my models and MMY's. I have no real opinion on the Rajas and the Raams, viewing them as an odd and occasionally-interesting drama that doesn't at the moment have much to do with me. Having been there myself (and in a deeper sense, being there now, as what I see is all "me" :-)), I can understand your puzzlement at her seeing angry faces where you do not. From where I stand now, though, it often appears that you actually *aren't* thinking clearly or logically, but are instead making comments from a specific wounded/resentful feeling-level which make perfect sense to -- and only to -- another person sharing that wounded/resentful feeling- level: That in fact you are communicating primarily to confirm your "ain't MMY awful" feeling-level (this I notice far more consistently and far more "loudly" in Barry and Steve than in you, Curtis). This may not at all be *your* truth, and I'm OK with that. I know that in truth, you are none of the above -- you are only and completely indescribably beautiful, radiant Being. And again, lest anyone think I am criticising anyone here, please know that I am not. It is, indeed, all me, and all indescribably perfect. I'm just describing me as clearly as I can in this moment. Most of all, I feel happy and blessed to know you all! :-) *L*L*L*
