RE: Simon stopping chemo and does not have long

[MacKenzie, Kerry N.]

Title: Message

Dear Michelle You and Simon have been through so much together, I am so, so sorry that he has become so ill again. It is so sad for him that he is so unwell, and so devastating for you. I know you will know if and when it is time to let him go. And I wish you all the strength you need at this very difficult time. Thinking of you and Simon, and praying he gets relief and can feel comfortable for however long he has left. Much love to you and dear Simon, Kerry -----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Friday, January 07, 2005 2:46 PM To: felvtalk@vlists.net Subject: Simon stopping chemo and does not have long I brought Simon in for the Adriamycin this morning, his 5th chemo treatment which he had to skip 3 days ago because his WBC was too low to get it. His WBC was back up towards normal, but his PCV had dropped to 15 and, more importantly, his bilirubin (liver values) were back up to 9.  Normal is under .8 (that's .8, not 8-- less than one).  On Tuesday he was at 2.5 and had been 1.3 the week before, so it has skyrocketed. He feels very sick and will not eat but I am syringing.  The oncologist said he could not give a full dose of Adriamycin or even a half dose without probably killing Simon, because it needs to be processed through the liver and his liver is so extremely compromised. He said he could try a 1/4 dose of it, but that even this would likely make him sicker than he is and necessitate a weekend of IV fluids for any hope of him processing it, and there would only be a miniscule chance that such a low dose would curb such aggressive and advanced cancer.  It seems like Simon went into remission, or close to it, after 3 weeks of chemo, and then came out of remission within a week. Apparently FeLV+ cats respond to chemo like other cats, but come out of it with resistant cancers much more quickly.  The oncologist was willing to do the 1/4 dose of Adriamycin or another drug I can not remember starting with a C and consisting of 3 letters, but said that he thought there was almost no chance of such low doses helping and that Simon would spend his last days in the hospital hooked up to IV, with strangers, and sicker.  He said if Simon were his cat he would take him home and see if he can have a few days of semi-comfort. He gave him a shot of dex and a shot of depo to see if that would shrink the tumors a little and keep him more comfortable. The dex should have set in by now, but is not having any effect. He does not want to be touched much, fought me when I syringed him, and is mostly hiding by himself. I am thinking of separating him from the other cats and keeping him in my bedroom so that he can be by himself without having to hide.  He is turning bright yellow. I do not think he has very long at all.  I am devastated.  We fought this so hard-- 3 transfusions, 5 days of hospitalization, 5 chemo treatments all in the last month. Syringe feedings and sub q fluids. He has been through so much, and all it gave him was a week or two in the middle when he was eating some and playing some and cuddling with Ginger. At that point I thought it was worth it, and maybe it was.  He is only 4 years old.  I am not sure how long to let him go on like this. My partner is against euthanasia, and I usually am not willing to do it until it is clear they are in the process of dying.  But it seems unlikely he will ever feel even remotely ok again.   If you pray, please pray for him to get some relief from the steroids and have at least a few more happy days, and then to go peacefully when he does go. Thanks, Michelle This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they are addressed. If you have received this email in error please notify the system manager. This message contains confidential information and is intended only for the individual named. If you are not the named addressee you should not disseminate, distribute or copy this e-mail.