Belgium uber alles!
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] (St.Auby Tamas) Reply-To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: FLUXLIST: Belgians Lead Push for Regime Change in America Date: Sun, 27 Oct 2002 00:35:42 +0200 fwd - >> Belgians Lead Push for Regime Change in America >> >> September 24, 2002 >> By Phil Lebovits >> >> Spurred by reports of an aggressive military >> build-up and failure to reign in corporate terrorists, >> the government of Belgium is pressing for a >> preemptive strike against the >> regime of George W. Bush. >> >> "We cannot sit idly by and eat our delicious chocolates >> while the United States government engages in a >> policy of harassment," Belgian Prime Minister Guy Verhofstadt >> said in a nationally-televised address to the Belgian >> people. "Now is the time for action. We cannot waffle." >> >> Recent reports from Belgian intelligence sources >> indicate that the United States is now in possession of >> weapons of mass destruction - chemical, biological and nuclear. >> "We know that the United States has nuclear weapons and >> that they have actually used them in the past," intoned >> the Prime Minister. "There is no reason to think they will >> not use them in the future." >> >> Verhofstadt is insisting that United Nations weapon >> inspectors be given "unfettered access to the >> massive stockpiles" of weapons, and that they be >> destroyed immediately. >> >> "We stand at the crossroads," pleaded Verhofstadt. >> "Either the United States agrees to our demands, or >> we will be forced to put down our delicious chocolates and >> lead the way for permanent regime change. Remember, >> my dear Walloons, the current clique in Washington was >> elected in direct contravention of the will of the American people. >> Regime change will be welcomed by their citizens." >> >> Reaction to the speech throughout Europe was swift. >> "We stand with our Belgian brothers," offered French >> President Jacques Chirac. "France is willing to commit >> thirty-five troops and many cases of fine champagne >> to the cause. We cannot stand on the sidelines >> enjoying our delicious baguettes while our comrades from >> Antwerp go it alone. Let me assure the dear Prime Minister. >> France is with you, almost." >> >> Russian President Vladimir Putin did not mince any >> words. "Again, it is the powerful Belgians who must lead >> the world against aggression and American hegemony. >> Russia stands with her European allies and insists that the >> United States disarm unilaterally. I only wish we too had >> delicious foods." >> >> Following the speech, the mood at the White House >> was one of defiance. "Let the Belgians make their empty >> threats," said White House spokesman Ari Fleischer. >> "We are urging Hershey's and Mars and other fine American >> chocolate makers to increase their yummy output by >> two-hundred percent in the coming weeks. We intend to >> break up the evil-doing Belgian chocolate cartel once and for all." >> >> Vice President Dick Cheney was even more bellicose. >> Speaking directly underneath Karl Rove from an undisclosed >> underground bunker, the Vice President warned of >> dire consequences should Belgium make a preemptive strike. >> >> "We are prepared to strike back with alarming >> force," said Cheney. "The Belgians cannot bully us. They >> may be the world's only superpower, but we here in America have >> God on our side. To hell with their delicious chocolate treats." >> >> Verhofstadt, while unyielding in tone and substance, >> did offer the Americans a plausible way out. "I call upon >> George W. Bush to capture Sheik Kenneth Lay, Imam >> Dennis Kozlowski, and the entire Worldcom terrorist organization, >> and to hand them over to an international tribunal. The >> United States can no longer harbor agents of terrorism. >> You are either with us or against us." >> >> Back in Washington, the Joint Chiefs of Staff and >> National Security Advisor Condaleeza Rice were trying eagerly >> to persuade President Bush that there was indeed a country >> named Belgium.
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