Just couldn't resist passing along this 'prayer.' For those of you who remember Ginsburg's epic poem Howl....... ---------- From: Sid Shniad To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: A Prayer to the Global Corporate Gods Date: Monday, May 25, 1998 1:42PM >Date: Thu, 21 May 1998 13:06:52 >Subject: A Prayer to the Global Corporate Gods > >A Prayer to the Global Corporate Gods: > >O mighty global corporations, we are helpless without you. Please bring >your menial jobs here to our nation and town. Though we have little >control over these arbitrary and tedious jobs that create wealth for >stockholders rather than us, they are all that we lowly workers deserve. >Grant us your x dollars per hour so that we might have hope of >purchasing your fine plastic products that bestow lasting contentment. >Forgive us when we question your authority or do not work fast enough, >for we are but wretched servants, and please oh pretty please do not >cast us onto the street where there is much weeping and knashing of >teeth. > >Drive us to serve you ever more diligently until our decrepit bodies and >minds break down, then patch us up in your hospitals and with your >anti-depressants as much as necessary to return to your service. And >when you have used us up completely, secure us in your nursing homes so >that we do not annoy you or your still-faithful devotees further. > >O corporate one big happy family Fathers, some of us are so worthless >that our skills do not match your product plans, and our resultant >poverty has led us astray to where we have broken the righteous >commandments that protect your bountiful property from us. Other >backsliders have foolishly attempted to escape the indoctrination of >your dollars through the use of mind altering substances. We accept that >the only rightful place for these shameful sinners among us is in a cold >cell of thick concrete deep within your prisons, where you will still >mercifully grace these human by-products with a few quarters per hour to >manufacture your office furniture. > >For those few hours when we are not in your service, thank you for >blessing us all with the security of predictable name brand products, >and for their copious packaging that assures that no heathens have laid >their unclean hands on the wondrous gifts within. Continue to spew your >intelligent poisons into our farmland and food to protect us from the >sinister insects and microorganisms. Prepare our food and even serve it >to us, that we may have more time to serve you. We will gladly consume >whatever you hand down to us, for you are all-knowing. > >Please pacify us with a plethora of prefabricated entertainment, as we >have forgotten how to entertain each other. Reveal to us through your >inspired media what we are to believe, for surely we cannot trust our >own feeble judgement. Similarly commodify any remaining life activities, >so that our angst-ridden existence is no more challenging than a series >of multiple-choice questions. > >Most important, guide your wise politicians financially as they strive >to make this region of the planet more cost-effective for you by >abolishing the evil worker rights laws, corporate taxation, and >environmental protections that offend you deeply and drive you away from >us. Help them enlighten the more backward cultures by dropping your holy > >bombs on the people of those demonic nation-states that still refuse to >bow down before you. > >And thank you for undercutting the pitifully small local businesses that >would dare defy your divine dominance and threaten the sacred homogenous >culture in which you have safely wrapped us. Truly all resources belong >to you, and we are but humble stewards of them. Continue to devour the >land and excrete into the rivers --- the Earth is your banquet and your >toilet. For thine is the empire, the power, and the planet, until you >destroy it. > >Amen. > >Copyright 1996 BiggerTheyCome (TM) Enterprises, a wholly-owned >subsidiary of GlobalGobble Corporation. Just try and steal this >intellectual property, you peasant, and see what happens!
