Joel, Thanks for reviewing this long document.
Will resolve the comments as part of a next revision after the last call. Thanks --Avshalom From: "Joel M. Halpern" <[email protected]> To: Mary Barnes <[email protected]>, General Area Review Team <[email protected]>, Ben Campbell <[email protected]> Date: 26/06/2009 06:46 PM Subject: [Gen-art] [gen-art] review: draft-ietf-simple-interdomain-scaling-analysis-06.txt Sent by: [email protected] (As all comments are minor, and there are many authors, I am directing this to the shepherd rather than copying all the authors and WG.) I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html). Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive. Document: draft-ietf-simple-interdomain-scaling-analysis-06.txt Presence Interdomain Scaling Analysis for SIP/SIMPLE Reviewer: Joel M. Halpern Review Date: 26-June-2009 IETF LC End Date: 6-July-2009 IESG Telechat date: N/A Summary: This document is probably ready for publication as an Informational RFC. If revisions are needed, some minor items should be considered. Major issues: Minor issues: I think that I do not understand how the document uses the term "day". c01 is the average lifetime of a subscription. However, it also seems to be the definition of day in section 2.3.5. This is not a big deal as it seems to normalize out when one looks at the per-second numbers. But it seems to make the "per day" numbers confusing. I suspect that what is needed is simply a definition of "day" for this document. Nits/editorial comments: The introduction has multiple examples of unusual English language usages. They are not listed here, but are left to the editors to analyze and resolve. (This problem continues at a lower frequency throughout the document.) Section 2.3.5 labels the third bottom line value as B02 instead of B03. The third line in section 3.1.3 should have a comma in the 23437M number for readability. _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list [email protected] https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
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