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Document: draft-ietf-emu-chbind-14.txt
Reviewer: Francis Dupont
Review Date: 20120407
IETF LC End Date: 20120412
IESG Telechat date: unknown
Summary: Ready
Major issues: None
Minor issues: None
Nits/editorial comments:
- Abstract page 1: NAS -> Network Access Server (BTW NAS has two meanings so
this is really
needed)
- ToC page 3 and many other places: Radius -> RADIUS
- Toc page 3 and 12 page 27: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments
- Introduction page 5 (twice) and many other places: e.g. -> e.g.,
- Introduction page 5: advertized -> advertised
- 3 page 6: I don't understand (i.e., wording problem):
... the EAP server can be
far removed from the authenticator.
^^^^^^^
- 3 page 6: Lads -> LANs
- 3 page 7 and other places: adversarial -> adversarious???
(BTW if my dictionary can't find it I have no problem to understand it)
- 4 page 8: I really appreciated this section!
- 4.1 page 9: a universal or an universal?
- 4.3 page 12: I don't know the expression "pockets of trust"?
- 5.2 page 15 (3 times) and at other places: i.e. -> i.e.,
- 5.3 page 16: IMHO the text should explain before the Figure 2 than the
format can
includes multiple ( Length, NSID, NS-Specific... ) triples (in fact one per
attribute
type)
- 5.3 page 17: of 1 . -> of 1. (or of "1". if 1. is ambiguous)
- 7.2 page 21: missing space in the figure?
0 1 2 3
0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
| Type | Length | Value
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
Value (cont) |
+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
^
|
- 9.1 page 23: interesting conclusion (:-)!
- 11.1 page 26: what is the size (or range) of this new parameter? IMHO the
best
should be to add a 10-XXX Unassigned line at the end (as it is done for
eap-numbers).
Note I believe IANA will have the same request...
- 12 page 27: Sam hartman -> Sam Hartman
- A.5 page 30: make the peer believe -> to believe?
- A.5 page 30: from the on the -> from the one the?
Thanks
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