I was ready to order glasses online, but fear kept nagging: What if I measured my PD incorrectly? Is there another way? Could I thwart the steely determination with which that axis of evil, the Optical Shop, is determined to hide these few essential digits?
I knew that I had to turn them against themselves, and where better to begin, what more deceitful tyranny than that of Lens Crafters? I strolled in casually just before the mall closed. I found a woman who looked like she really wanted to get out of there. I knew a direct assault was risky, but it was my best shot. "Can you measure my pupillary distance?" A jolt of awe swept across her face and was gone in a blink. Surely she had never witnessed such effrontery. Yet, with a glance at the clock, she relented. Another minute and I sauntered out with the prize: 58 millimeters. Still, it wasn't the end. The anxiety crept back. I had measured it a few millimeters different each time. What if the woman had tricked me, had raged at my insolence and fought back with bogus numbers that would torment me with headaches? Finally, it was D-Day: my annual eye exam. I cruised smoothly through the motions. I feigned ambivalence about whether I really wanted a new pair of glasses. The optician sat me down at a table and held up the ruler. She marked dots on my old pair of glasses. But alas, she pulled them off of my face to look at them as she wrote the numbers! The paper was a blur! Then, a miracle. The phone rang. She walked away. I picked up my glasses with their red-dotted lenses and gaped at the numbers on the updside-down paper. Right: 29. Left: 30. I scribbled them on a business card and shoved it in my pocket. A pocket gloriously full with the $300 I saved. Thank you, GlassyEyes. --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Check us out at the oft-updated http://www.glassyeyes.com! You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "GlassyEyes" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/glassyeyes?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
