Kaitulo Ban Gaya English Man Kaitulo maskar mhonllear, ganvant taka konnuch vollkonaslo oxe mhunn nam. Orxim Caitan tagelem niz zolm nanv. Kaitulo dor Aitarak, tin dhukrank katorta. Tannem kartorlolea dhukranchem mas vorunk lagxilo ani poisulea xezari ganvcho lok upott ghaltat. Dhukrank molaitana, justuch taka kolltalem khoincho dhukor chodd ani unnem chorbecho poi te. Chodd chorob aslole dhukor to fokot pakitamni ani latani bhortolea dhondekarak katortalo, ani unnem chorbeche tuntunit dhukranchem mas to aplea sodachea giraykank vinktalo. To chodd ulovpi nhi. Goroz thoinsor tachem tondd ugoddtalem. Purtugezachim don gonttam xiklolo dekhun, taka Konknni vachunk-borounk zatali. Thoddi bhov Inglix kana velean veta ti, to monan laun ghetalo. Punn chukun porian Inglejichem utor uloi naslo. Punn kednaim monank dislem zalear Inglez disalancher ek dhanvti nodor martalo. Tachi bhurgim Inglejin xiktalim. Tachea dhondean, tachi visvaxi ghorkarnn Rozu, taka adar ditali. Hea disamni Kaitulo matso pertubad (disturb) koso diso. Medium of Instruction ho proxn taka guspagonddolan ghaltalo. Inglixik grants dili zalear, Gõychi osmitay, porompora, sonskruttay nopoit zait mhunn taka husko zalolo. Ani to huske kaddit astona, Gõycha sorkaran Inglejik grants dilem mhunn aikona borobor tancho mendu kottkottunk laglo. Ani konnei-i dhukracho mendu maglear to challvollun poddtalo.
Tea disa Inglix madhyoma khatir zomat zaleli tika hajir zaunk, ek bos bhorun Inglix xikunk ani ulounk noko aslolea ganvchea lokak ghevn Ponnje Azad Maidanar gheloli. Ani Inglix uloitolo lok ghorant sust nidhlolo. Lokak utthavunk ani soglli bondabost korunk, ganvche eke ttichericho hat aslo. Tea ttichericho taka khub rag yetalo. “Ek kil mas di re”, Remet-an maglem. “With or without bones?” Kaitulean vicharlem. Remet, Kaituleacha tonddakuch pollenvk urlo. Inglejichem utor uloinaslolo monis Inglix tasta? Taka ojeapuch dislem. Taka biblicher (Bible) aslole kanniecho ugddas zalo. Eka mon’xacher denvchar boslele. Noxtte atme taka sotaytale. Jezu Kristan tachevele denvchar kaddle ani dongrar dhukracho hindd aslo thoim soddle. Ani tim dhukram doryan vochun uddki marun melim. Katorlolea dhukrancher Remetin ek dhanvti nodor marli. Soglle ganvtti dhukor asle. Remetik dislem, Inglix dhukor khatorleat (orxim marina) ani ghoddie tanchea velem Inglix bhut bha Kaituleacher boslam. “Tell, tell man. People r waiting man”, Remet ogich aslolo pollevn Kaitulean mhontlem. “Hadd naslolem ek kilo mas”, Utram zhodd zalolea vorim Remet uloilo. “Pain sanglam, ek kilo hadd-mas di mhunn.”, Carasila-chea putan sanglem. “No, no man. No more bones-meat for your credit father” “Arre Kaitu titiv. Tum Inglix uloita? Tuk’ konn xikoylea? Dhukramni? Hadd-mas kiteak dina?” “Your kanjus father has not payed me last week amount. Listen idiot. No credit anymore. Go from here, you son of a----stupid.” Laginch asloli Kaituchi bail tanchim utram aikun thotakli. Konknnilean, tachea tonddanlean chukun porian vaitt utor bhair sorop mhonnchem khorench tacho konnem tori bezo khaila oxem somzuchem. Orxim ragar zalo zalear, mansugen ulovpi. Punn aiz? Tachi khor Inglix chintunk poddli. “Good morning Tolu Aunty” “Kitem? Tolu Aunty? Sodanch Dev boros dis dium Tolotin timaim mhonnpi amgelo Kaitu, aiz Inglejicha manddar koso choddlo go Rozu?”, Kaituleache bailek tinnem vicharlem “Why r you asking my wife? Ask me. This is effect of, of, of…” “Medium of Instruction”, Kaituche bailen, to kitem mhonnonk sodtalo tem sanglem. “Oh yes my dear, medium of instruction. Thank you for helping me. Tolu Aunty, this is yours 1 kilo meat without bones, and ½ kilo with bones”, Kaitulean churchurit Inglix tasli. Tolu timai tondd h-a-a-m korun, duddu farik kele. Kaitulo koso Inglez zalo tem chintit, ti ghora dixen cholunk lagli. “Ek akhench pernn di re. Ani don kilo chops. Don kilo barik mas.”, lhanxi khannavoll choloitolea Forsun maglem. “My dear wife please weighs the chops and cut this meat into little pieces. Mean time I-…, Hey buddy, which leg do you want man. Front leg or back leg?” Kaituleachi Inglix Forsuchea mhateavelean gheli. Tachea Bar-Restaurant-an bhaile gore katiche bhonvddekar yetat. Tache kodden ulovpak tachi Inglix pavona mhunn tannem ek Inglix xiklolea bhurgeak nokrek dovorla. Kaituchem taka ojeap dislem. Tache itlich Inglix zanno aslolo tor, to aplea dhondean foddol ghalpacho. Jea dhondean Inglix basechi goroz nam thoim Inglix atam chalu zalea. Hem medium of instruction ‘digital’ zalem zalear Gõycha sonskruttayecho nas zait mhunn bhirant asa. Oso to chintit astona tachi order toyar zali mhunn, Kaitulean taka zagoylo. “Boremxem ek kilo pottantlem di re Kaitu irmanv”, Moddganche eka famad Inglix iskolant xikovpi ani lokak toyar korun Ponnje Azad Maidanar vorpi tticher Filomenan sorpatelachi ruch kaddit maglem. “Mind your foul language Mrs. Furtado.” “Kitem? Mrs. Furtado? Mhaka tticherbai mhunn zapoytolo monis Mrs. Furtado mhonnta? Kiteacher Inglix thapoyta re tum? Ani ek sang. Why did you ask me to take care of my tongue?” “Dear Mrs Furtado. What do you mean boremxem ek kilo pottantlem di? Here I am selling the best pork meat that will never ever find elsewhere. I am not cutting unhealthy pigs and selling the rotten meat to my consumers. Customer satisfaction is my top priority. Do you understand that……” “Hem ghe tticher-baye, tujem pottantlem”, Modench tondd ghalun Katuleachi bail uloili. Kaituleachem Inglix bhaxonn aikun tticher Filomen kuntt koxi ubi urli. Tinnem sopnant porian chintunk nam, Kaitulo thoddi bhov bori Inglejiche gontt zannam mhunn. Konknnin uloypant ami kitli chuk kortat tem tika, aiz zallvun ailem. ‘Borexem ek kilo pottantlem di’, hem magop mhonnchem, poilea pavtti ailolo giraykar sozmotolo khorench Kaitu piddear zal’lem mas vikta mhunn. Duddu farik korunk tticher Filomen apnnalem handbeg sospotona, Kaitun vicharlem” “Mam, have you read yesterday’s news paper?” “Na! Kitem khas vachpachem aslem?” “My dear wife please read it…..” “Those ministers who have supported the decision MOI should henceforth speak only in English” “Hanvem kitem korchem?” Tticherin vicharlem. “Very nice question. I like it mam. You supported the decision of MOI. You arranged the buses to take our village people to Panjim for the MOI meeting. From now on, you must stop doing the Konkani Mass readings in the church.” “Kitem uloyta re tum. Inglez xikpak ani Konknni vachpak kosli forok asa? “My dear wife Rozu, kindly read the rest of the news to our non-reader newspaper teacher” “If they are found talking Konkani or Marathi, the people will teach them a lesson.” Zonglavnem nastona goddgoddeavea vonn odhik kor avazachim utram aikon tticherichem kan bhere zall’lea vorim zale. Kitloch vell khorench Kaitulo Inglix uloyta vo tacher okosmat inglejicho bhut boslam hem chintpak tigeli Konknni ani Inglix misoll zaloli tokli, tika sotaypak lagli. Unnem xikloleanchi ti kikont kortali. Dhukrankar, podder, render xikunk naslole oxem ti somzotali. Gorib-girest vegllozar ti kori. Hech khatir tticherichi hi vagnnuk Kaituleak tiddok haddtali. Punn aiz tannem, dhukrak solltat te toren tika sollun kaddli. Hatant aslolem dhukrachem potantlem xizoy nastona sorpatel korun dilem. Orxim Kaitulo mullavem xikxonn Inglejin zalem mhunn virudh naslo. Lino B. Dourado
