i've really been thinking about this thread.  marcel said something to the 
affect that parents need to be able to show their children not only the 
beautiful work of art, but also point out the bottle of absinthe sitting on 
the table in the picture.  

my 11 year old son went to atlanta last year to see the starry night.  i've 
still not seen it in person but i have prints of it everywhere.  so when he 
came home he was really excited and he said, ..dad, it doesn't look like 
those prints you have.  he said the trees on the left side are really more 
green, not brown.  and there are all these colors mixed inside out, so what 
looks green may have orange streaked through it and it's really neat.

then he said, but dad, i don't get the suicide.  what was that all about.  
and i started to explain slowly...like a little last year, and little this 
year and more next year and so on, about how hard solitude can be.  and how 
we can get lost in a funnel of depression. and about mental illness that can 
deceive us.  

and then there's the absinthe.  last year i read some articles in the nyt 
about absinthe and how now many scholors believe that vincent's depression 
was at least exaggerated, if not even induced by the drinking of poisonous 
absinthe.  so there you go son,...maybe the grain alchohol was bad.  like 
some bad drugs.  it may have fried his brain.

the absinthe on the table is important in helping our children to understand 
life's complexities.  we see posts, one even recently, about how hard it is 
for us to like some artist after we find out something really ugly about them 
(sammy davis jr.)   i think it's even harder for children to understand that. 
 so we have to help them.  and to do that, they need to see the details.  
even if they're not pretty.  or if they seem insignificant.  or even if some 
might think we are giving them too much "detail" so as to limit their own 
individuality.   they need to know the depth of what they are seeing.  
otherwise, they are living in a compromised reality.  

and that compromised reality can go two ways.  one could say...oh i love 
vincent van gogh and he's so beautiful....but never talk about the shot gun 
and the wheat field.  or one could go the opposite way like i heard someone 
say recently ...why do you like him,,,nasty depressed creepy guy who blew 
himself away. 

i don't think either of those two statements show the complete reality of 
vincent.  i want my son to see vincent's beauty, which he does.  and i want 
him to see his suffering and his loss.  becuase they are surely as interwoven 
and laced and 'streaked' together as his blue and grey and green and orange 
paints were.  like joni said, turbulent indigos.

that's probably one of the reasons i like joni so much.  i think she's very 
honest about reality.  more than honest, i think she passionately pursues an 
honest reality.  and when i hear her talk now, as a mature woman, i really 
think that more and more.  like on ttt...she said..kiss my ass.  but she also 
said...this is his town and i'm going down.  she understands her choices and 
their consequences.  she'd make a hell of a grandmother. 
patrick
np. emmylou and dave matthews- my antonia

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