It starts with a web search. "Joni Mitchell." You sift through the hits and
before long find the Mecca. Joni-Mitchell-dot-com and JMDL-dot-com. You
have followed her career, every step and every song, for decades. It's a
glorious discovery...there are others out there who truly appreciate her
art. Kindred spirits who "get her."
You lurk for a while and one day take the plunge. You wonder how you will
be received after that first post, and check your e-mail constantly for a
while, hoping that response(s) will be positive.
A few exchanges begin, on-list and off. Friendships are born. Siquomb is
spoken. Life is good!
You develop relationships. With the list, with individual listers. Checking
for "new mail" becomes fun and important to you. You open up more, and in
so doing, find that not everyone is nice. You learn that this "community"
has its share of dysfunction, and if you're a contributor to the list,
eventually you're going to take some heat.
But your love of Joni's craft is unwavering and you are by nature an open
and generous person. You couldn't change these personality traits even if
you wanted. You could lurk, or you could toss it in, but you have so much
to give, so you stay. And you become a very visible and revered member of
the community.
Years pass. Concerts, fests large and small, tapings, exhibits. Fate is
kind. You share the experiences. By default you become a ringleader. And
you're damn good at it. Serendipity puts you in the right places at the
right times, and you warmly and skillfully report back to the community so
that we who are interested may live vicariously through your "real life"
Joni encounters.
Despite all your contributions, skirmishes develop. Unwarranted personal
attacks lead to despair. You put so much into the group and would go
forever without so much as a "thank you" but it's worse than that...a lack
of acknowledgement would be OK, but the skewering...for what reason? What
did you do to deserve this?
I don't blame you for leaving. I've gone away before myself a time or two.
But each time I return it's with a more jaded view. Nobody would lament
that for me, but for you...ahh...you're different. You represented so much.
You were the ideal JMDLer. And now you're gone, perhaps never to return.
It is with much sadness that I announce to the list that Kakki has left
this "community." She departed with her customary grace and without
fanfare. She's not pining, she's not sulking, and she doesn't know I'm
writing this. In fact she is spending the weekend taking care of her
elderly father. But she's withdrawn from the JMDL, and I thought the list
should know that. I want you to consider, prior to the next time you
exercise your right to "free speech" and post away with insulting and
insensitive words, that if we really want this discussion group to be a
place we're proud of, we've got to consider how our posts can impact
others. Please use temperance the next time you put a name or a label on
someone. That isn't preaching, BTW...it's a plea.
What does a particular Joni song or album mean to you? A question for the
ages. Tonight I'll put on her favorite, "For The Roses." I'll listen to the
music and I'll think of what we've lost. I'll hope that her memories of
time spent here will be of the good times, not the bad. I'll remember how
much she has enriched my own experience, and give thanks. A martini glass
will be raised, the ice cold elixir savored, with one simple thought: baby,
this one's for you.
Scott
