I wrote to Bob M "I am replying off line so as to avoid irritating others on
the list who hold Jericho among their favorites."
And after I eventually posted the message to the list, Bob M. replied:
"Firstly, Bob S, thanks for bringing your post to the masses...it was much
too good to be enjoyed by only me! And I'm really bowled over at your
statement here, because to ME Jericho is one the most **mature** love songs
ever written! "
So, Bob M, it sounds like I should have been at least as worried about
ruffling yours feathers as all the others on the list
;-). Seriously, since you are the lyric mavin, I am forced to respectfully
reconsider. However, I know this; the lyric disturbs and irritates me. I
suspect this is on two levels. First, there is something (are some things)
that really bother me about the content and style of the message - perhaps a
line by line analysis would increase my insight as to why. Second, I suspect
that there is something a little too close to home for me in this song, that
I would prefer not to confront - perhaps a visit for a different kind of
analysis is in order instead. ;-~
Here is a brief go at the first analysis:
1. "I'll try" appears three times in the song, and I have come to
basically agree with those who say that those words are indicators of
immaturity. I much prefer "I'll promise" or "I will". Joni says she made a
promise to love when it was new, but I would have preferred the promise to be
to the the partner, and not to her efforts in the game of love, which sounds
more like a promise to herself.
2. She says "keep myself open up to you", implying that she is already
open (has no trouble opening up), but has trouble staying open. If she had
said "I''ll try to open myself up to you", that could have logically led into
"let these walls come tumbling down" - but it sounds like they were already
down. This may be a semantic nit to pick, but she repeats it twice later in
the song, so I feel entitled to assume it was a deliberate choice of words.
Let's give her the benefit of the doubt, and assume she meant that a
relationship that seems open for now is not really open for good until the
walls are down permanently.
3. "I said it like I finally found the way to keep the good feelings alive
- I said it like it was something to strive for". This couplet sounds to me
like she thinks that keeping the good feelings (infatuation ?) alive is the
issure rather than developing them further into something deeper and more
commited. Also, the word "like" implies that she doubts the words she uttered
- "like I finally found the way (as if she hadn't)...like it was something
to strive for (as if it weren't) - and is still not convinced her promise is
the way to go.
4. "Approve your self expression". Why should her partner need her
approval - isn't the "space" to act and express oneself openly a given in a
mature relationship, no approval needed ? (This is not to be confused with
approving each act or expression itself.)
5. "I need that too" - is that the space, or the approval ? (refer to "The
Same Situation")
6. "I need your confidence, baby, and the gift of your extra time - In
turn I'll give you mine". Here, the order matters to me. First, we have her
needs (that is backwards thinking in relationships, really). Once she has
that, she will return the favor - it is an exchange. Rather, "I'll give you
my confidence honey (stop calling me baby), and the gift of my extra time -
in turn I'd love to have yours, too ( do it that way, and you will get it).
7. "Sweet darling, it's a rich exchange, it seems to me, it's a warm
arrangement" . There, that sounds like a fair trade, doesn't it ? And while I
believe that good relationships are warm arrangements - not in the pejorative
sense of her devastating, penetrating song of that title from LOTC - it
sounds to me like she is trying convince herself or her partner that that is
good enough - let's settle, even if we have to pretend a little bit.
8. "Anyone will tell you Just how hard it is to make and keep a friend". A
great line - to some other song. What's friendship got to do with it ? ;-)
I say that half-jokingly, but hasn't this been a song about love up until now
? And in the next line she excuses the ending of friendships (has she reduced
the love to friendship in order to justify walking away from it ?) - either
your friend screws you, or you (Joni) are the Judas - when you can no longer
pretend. Is she thinking about doing it again - walking out because she is
bored, and is not looking for "a warm arrangement" ?. Then she tries to stop
herself short of doing it, reminding herself with the repeat of the final
verse's chant, and the revelation that staying and working at it rather than
bolting is getting easier with the discipline of practice.
Are we doing well because of discipline, or are we naturals, do we really
feel it ? Maybe that's what's bothering me.
Whew. I'm spent. Forget the other analysis. ;-)
Bob S.
