-------Original Message-------
From: Mark or Travis
So I cannot honestly say that I have completely eradicated some of the
idiotic things I grew up hearing about from people who were supposed
to be wiser than me. I can only say that I do my best to try & see
people for what they are underneath the 'joke' that God has played on
us by making us all appear to be different. And yes, I acknowledge
that each of is different - unique and special in our own way - and I
think cultures and backgrounds are important and worth remembering and
preserving. But in the end, I want to be color-blind. But I have to
honestly admit that I'm just not there yet.
I reply:
What you describe happens to all of us. We all get brought up with the
prejudices of those that brought us up, the society we live in, those that
teach us at school and in church.
It is frustrating when one thinks one thing and feels another. For example,
I know that sex is a joyous thing to be enjoyed. Howeevr, I have this other
voice that is so deep it is a feeling, that sex is wrong and a truly good
person not only would not have sex but would not desire it either. I was
taught that the only reason to give in to such a desire would be to produce
a child and then only within marriage and only because it had to be done.
But it was far more Godly to not do so. I was also told that women only
started to menstruate because they had sinful thoughts about sex!!!!!!
And to be really honest: if I see a picture(in mags or the newspaper-yes we
have htem in our dailies here) of a naked man I either think'he's nice' or
he isn't my taste' and that is it. If I see a a pictuyre of a naked woman, I
feel bad for her, cos a woman really shouldn't do that sort of thing!!!!
Beofre you go shooting off a reply to denounce me, read it again and the
context. I am totally aware of the double standard here. Like I said, it is
very difficult to get rid of the shit taught to you when young.
I tend to eat watching the tv, ffod on my lap and using only a fork. I can
still here my parents say'just cos the Americans have no manners doen't mean
you shouldn't have them'. yes, they thought Americans were very uncouth and
rude with no table manners. They were very hot on such things. Be polite,
drress well, eat properly, obey adults, be nice and never tell anyone that
we beat the shit out of you in the house and treat you like dirt and
certainly behave very uncouthly!
Living authentically, really getting to grips with yourself and how you
think is not easy at all and requires courage. One of the hardest things for
most people to accpt that the people who taught them when young were wrong,
hence people will say things like'I was beaten as a child and it din't do me
any harm' or they will say' it must be right because my church or the pope
says so'.Or ' vote democrat or republican because my parents did' or 'black
peoplle are not the same as us' because that is what i was taught.
the biggest cop out is to justify your present postion by saying'it was the
way I was brought up'. So what? Work on changing it!
bw
colin
Mark in Seattle
