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~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ====> LABLaughsClean =====> http://www.LABLaughs.com ======> Another F-R-E-E mailing from LABLaughs.com ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * <><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><> Do you have an invention idea? Click here for a FREE Inventors Kit from Inventors Helpline. http://psstt.com/1/c/22998/45602/178862/178862 <a href="http://psstt.com/1/c/22998/45602/178862/178862"> AOL users click here </a> <><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><> ^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.- INTRODUCTION Be Good Always! All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher. - Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914) ^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.- QUICK JOKE Why can't a bank keep a secret? 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As they lay down for the night, Holmes asked, "Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see." Watson said, "I see millions and millions of stars." Holmes said, "And what does that tell you?" Watson replied, "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?" "That somebody stole our tent," answered Holmes. ^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.- <><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><> Need Cash Now? Bad Credit? No Credit? NO PROBLEM!!! 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This is a recording." ^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.- <><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><> WANTED: Men & Women Who Are Sick and Tired of Being Fat! New Fat-Blocking Compound FLUSHES FAT OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM! Weight loss begins INSTANTLY! Excess pounds and inches are safely washed away before they attach to your body. Works even in toughest cases! Don't believe us...Get a FREE BOTTLE and SEE FOR YOURSELF! Click here for details. http://psstt.com/1/c/22998/58547/179969/179969 <a href="http://psstt.com/1/c/22998/58547/179969/179969"> AOL users click here </a> <><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><> ^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.- BILL CLINTON'S CLOCK! A guy dies and goes to heaven. It's a slow day for St. Peter, so, upon passing the entrance test, St. Peter says "I'm not very busy today, why don't you let me show you around?" The guy thinks this is a great idea and graciously accepts the offer. St. Peter shows him all the sights, the golf course, the reading room and library, the observation room, the cafeteria and finally, they come to a HUGE room full of clocks. The guy asks, "What's up with these clocks?" St. Peter explains, "Everyone on earth has a clock that shows how much time he has left on earth. When a clock runs out of time, the person dies and comes to the Gates to be judged." The guy thinks this makes sense but notices that some of the clocks are going faster than others. He asks why is that? St. Peter explains, "Every time a living person tells a lie, it speeds up his clock." This also makes sense, so the guy takes one last look around the room before leaving and notices one clock in the center of the ceiling. On this clock, both hands are spinning at an unbelievable rate. So he asks, "What's the story with that clock?" "Oh, that," St. Peter replies, "That's Bill Clinton's clock. 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