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====> LABLaughsClean
=====> http://www.LABLaughs.com
======> Another F-R-E-E mailing from LABLaughs.com

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INTRODUCTION

Cool Wishes!

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is 
enemy action.

- Auric Goldfinger, in "Goldfinger" by Ian L. Fleming 
(1908-1964)

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QUICK JOKE

Do you know how you can tell the really stupid guy at the 
airport? 

He's the one throwing bread to the planes.

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CARTOON TIME

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WINDOW SEAT!

Amanpreet had told all of his friends about the great steak 
he had eaten downtown the day before. A group of them 
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The group was seated in the back of the restaurant. After 
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To their collective disappointment, the waiter brought out 
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"Now see here," a very embarrassed Preet said to the waiter. 
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steaks! What is the meaning of this?" 

"Yes, sir," replied the waiter, "yesterday you were sitting 
by the window."

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IRISH FAMILY CUSTOM....

An Irishman walked into a bar in Dublin. He ordered three 
pints of Guinness, sat in the back of the room, and drank a 
sip out of each one in turn. When he finished them, he came 
back to the bar and ordered three more. 

The bartender said, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw 
it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time." 

The Irishman replied, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. 
One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in 
Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink 
this way to remember the days when we drank together." 

The bartender admitted that this was a nice custom and left 
it there. 

The Irishman became a regular in the bar and always drank 
the same way. One day, he came in and ordered two pints. All 
the other regulars noticed and fell silent. 

When he came back to the bar for the second round, the 
bartender said, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but 
I want to offer my condolences on your great loss." 

The Irishman looked confused for a moment, then a light 
dawned in his eye and he laughed. 

"Oh, no, everyone's fine. I've just quit drinking."

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THE POKER GAME!

Six guys were playing poker, when Smith lost $500 on a 
single hand, clutched his chest, and dropped dead at the 
table. 

Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five 
completed their playing time standing up. 

Roberts looked around and asked, "Now, who is going to tell 
the wife?" 

They drew straws. Rippington, who was always a loser, 
picked the short one. 

They told him to be discreet, be gentle, and not to make a 
bad situation worse. 

"Gentlemen! Discreet? I'm the most discreet man you will 
ever meet. Discretion is my middle name, leave it to me." 

Rippington walked over to the Smith house and knocked on 
the door. The wife answered, asking what he wanted. 

Rippington said, "Your husband just lost $500 playing 
cards." 

She hollered, "TELL HIM TO DROP DEAD!" 

Rippington said, "I'll tell him."

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