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====> LABLaughsClean
=====> http://www.LABLaughs.com
======> Another F-R-E-E mailing from LABLaughs.com

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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INTRODUCTION

Eat Healthy Food!

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. 
The opposite of a profound truth may well be another 
profound truth.

- Niels Bohr (1885-1962)

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QUICK JOKE

Two cab drivers met. "Hey," asked one, "Why did you paint one 
side of your cab red and the other side blue?" 

"Well," the other responded, "When I get into an accident, 
you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."

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CARTOON TIME

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DIFFERENCE.....

What is the difference between a physicist, an engineer, and 
a mathematician? 

If an engineer walks into a room and sees a fire in the 
middle and a bucket of water in the corner, he takes the 
bucket of water and pours it on the fire and puts it out. 

If a physicist walks into a room and sees a fire in the 
middle and a bucket of water in the corner, he takes the 
bucket of water and pours it eloquently around the fire and 
lets the fire put itself out. 

If a mathematician walks into a room and sees a fire in the 
middle and a bucket of water in the corner, he convinces 
himself there is a solution and leaves.

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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FOREIGN VISITOR!

Father visiting America, from Europe, for the very first 
time. Goes up & down the aisles with his son, at the local 
Giant Food Store.

Dad: "Vas diss?? Powdered orange juice??"

Son: "Yeh, Dad. You just add a little water, and you have 
fresh orange juice."

A few minutes later, in a different aisle

Dad: "Und vas dis?? Powdered milk?"

Son: "Yeh, Dad. You just add a little water, and you have 
fresh milk!"

A few minutes later, in a different aisle

Dad: "Und give a look here!! Baby Powder !! Vat a country, 
vat a country!"

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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NURSING HOME....

One evening, a family brings their frail, elderly mother to 
a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared 
for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a 
tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window 
overlooking a lovely flower garden.

She seems O.K. but after a while she slowly starts to lean 
over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately 
rush up to catch her and straighten her up.

Again, she seems O.K. but after a while she starts to tilt 
to the other side. The nurses rush back and once more bring 
her back upright. This goes on all morning.

Later, the family arrives to see how the old woman is 
adjusting to her new home. "So Ma, how is it here? Are they 
treating you all right?" they ask.

"It's pretty nice," she replies. "Except they won't let you 
fart."

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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We claim no copyrights to the material in our mailing lists,
if you do Forward it then please leave it intact. If you
wish to reproduce material, then permission is granted, a
link and credit would be nice but is in no way required.

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Please feel free to send us any feedback or comments about
this, or any other LABLaughs Service. We aim to please. Just
send mailto: [EMAIL PROTECTED] and we'll try to please you!

Don't forget to visit our site at http://www.LABLaughs.com

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