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====> LABLaughsClean
=====> http://www.LABLaughs.com
======> Another F-R-E-E mailing from LABLaughs.com

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

STOP GAGGING ON FISTFULS OF VITAMINS....

Life Force has been manufacturing liquid vitamins for 
21 years.

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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INTRODUCTION

Happy Life to All!

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish 
the rest.
 
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)

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QUICK JOKE

Patient to cosmetic surgeon: "Will it hurt, doctor?" 

Surgeon: "Only when you get my bill, Mrs. Brown."

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CARTOON TIME

LATE AGAIN!

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

I've entered a great promotion over at CruiseSweeps.com
You can Win a FREE Cruise-A-Day- 365 days a year. It's true!
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AFTER CHRISTMAS THOUGHT!

A few days after Christmas, my six-year-old son and I were 
talking. He asked, "Mom, is there a Santa Claus?" 

"Well, what do you think?" I asked him. 

He replied, "Well, my Playstation that I got and my gift 
from Santa were wrapped in the same kind of wrapping paper." 
He thought for a minute and said, "I'll tell you what ... 
you and Dad can go on buying me presents and let's just 
forget we ever had this talk!"

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

ITT Technical Institute is one of the nation's leading 
providers of technology education.  Click here for FREE 
information about what we have to
offer at our 70 locations nationwide. 
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DEMS AND LIGHTBULBS

How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb?


14 White House aids to appear on the Sunday morning news 
shows denying that the bulb is burned out. 

8 White House aides to blame the previous administration. 

4 Major news anchors to call the Republicans mean-spirited. 

243 children to stand behind Clinton as he explains the 
impact of burned-out bulbs on our children and how the 
mean-spirited Republicans want our children to grow up in 
darkness. 

1 First Lady to say that changing the light bulb takes a 
village. 

9 Hollywood stars to testify as experts because they played 
a movie role in which they changed light bulbs. 

15 White House spin doctors to put the best light on it. 

103 US Representatives to tell us that only Washington D.C. 
really knows how to change a light bulb. 

1 President to tell us that he feels our darkness and has 18 
new federal programs to prevent burned-out light bulbs, and 
that he has vivid memories of black light bulbs burning out 
during his childhood in Arkansas. 

42 Cruise missiles to take the heat off the burned-out bulb. 

1 campaign advisor to recommend the use of red light bulbs. 

1 Vice President to inform us of the environmental impact of 
changing a light bulb. 

2 White House advisors to devise a tax on those who are 
unfairly able to change their own light bulbs. 

1 Dead White House lawyer who can be blamed for anything 
that can't be pinned on the Republicans. 

1 White House ghost who can retrieve the light bulb files 
that no one else knows anything about. 

5,000 Bureaucrats to make sure that the bulb is changed 
correctly, doesn't offend anyone, doesn't impact the 
environment, doesn't unfairly benefit one group, doesn't 
harm anyone during the installation, and is up to 1945 
specifications for light bulbs.

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL.....

The controller working a busy pattern told the 727 on 
downwind to make a 360. The pilot of the 727 complained, "Do 
you know it costs us two thousand dollars to make a 360 in 
this airplane?" Without missing a beat the controller 
replied, "Roger, give me four thousand dollars worth." 

PSA was following United, taxiing out for departure. PSA 
called the tower and said "Tower, this is United 586. We've 
got a little problem, so go ahead and let PSA go first." 
The tower promptly cleared PSA for takeoff before United had 
a chance to object to the impersonation. 

A DC-10 had an exceedingly long landing rollout after 
landing with his approach speed just a little to high... San 
Jose Tower: "American 751 Heavy, turn right at the end if 
able. If not able, take the Guadalupe exit off of Highway 
101 back to the airport. 

Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure 
on 124.7" Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to 
Departure... by the way, as we lifted off we saw some kind 
of dead animal on the far end of the runway." Tower: 
"Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 
124.7... did you copy the report from Eastern?" Continental 
635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff... and yes, we 
copied Eastern and we've already notified our caterers."

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

FREE Cruise-A-Day- 365 days a year!!!

                   ... Interested?              Click below:

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Click on the Passenger List to see who all are 
already going!

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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if you do Forward it then please leave it intact. If you
wish to reproduce material, then permission is granted, a
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Please feel free to send us any feedback or comments about
this, or any other LABLaughs Service. We aim to please. Just
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Don't forget to visit our site at http://www.LABLaughs.com

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