For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way 
computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer 
industry with the auto industry and stated, "If Ford had kept up with 
technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars 
that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, Ford issued a press release stating : If Ford 
had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the 
following characteristics (and I just love this part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........twice a day.

2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy new 
car. 
3...Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would 
have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the 
car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some 
reason you would simply accept this.  

4... Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your 
car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to 
reinstall the engine. 

5...Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five 
times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent 
of the roads.  

6... The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be 
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning 
light. 

(I love the next one!!!)   
7.. The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.  

8... Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and 
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned 
the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.  

9.... Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to 
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same 
manner as the old car. 

10.... You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off. 

PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call "customer 
service" in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how 
to fix your car yourself!!!! 
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