At 05:51 AM 4/3/2007, you wrote:
>Hello Marsha:
>
>It's kind of funny to ask me that, I'm only 16. Anyway:
>
>I consider marriage as a mere bond between a male and a female of
>approximately same age. It's a bond, just like regular friendship. However,
>when a couple is married, and have given birth to a child, I believe that
>they *must not,* by any means, divorce because they have a huge
>responsibility. If they haven't had a child yet, then I'd say it's fair
>enough to divorce if they really do feel there is a problem of
>compatibility.
>
>I for one am not eager to marry because all I want is intellectual (and at
>most social) bonds with persons, not biological bonds. Biological bonds, are
>not to persons per se, but more to activities in relation to persons
>(=sex), extending also to drugs. I have read fairly enough on addictions
>and have found out that it's best to stay completely out of it all, because
>you always keep wanting for more when you do it "just once".
>
>Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that plays a key role in the cycle of
>addictions. An addict needs a minimum of 14 days to be free of the dopamine
>highs-and-lows of the pleasure-depression cycle to regain minimum discipline
>to further the resistance from temptations.
>
>This view, although apparently propogated by strictly religious priests,
>I've not taken it from them, nor have I been brought up in such an
>environment. My up-bringing (both at home and school) taught me that
>marriage is very normal, you have to do it, and the way they hid and
>suppressed talk of sex made it even more interesting. But I found out sex is
>way over-rated. I don't (intend to) know about drugs.
>
>Do tell me your views, I'm eager to hear since I'm quite an introvert and
>have not shared this view with people.
>
>-- Akshay
Greetings Akshay,
At 05:19 AM 4/2/2007, you wrote:
>This is the only issue that I have come in disagreement with Pirsig in Lila.
>Phaedrus, whom I so much admired (yeah, you could say it's the teenage idol
>syndrome) suddenly turned out to be a sexed up man who goes around bars
>drinking and smoking, no matter of what intellectual stature he be. And if
>you let that be fiction, Pirsig's also married *twice*.
I am not so judgmental as you. I asked your opinion of marriage
because it sounded rather negative from the statement above.
I once asked a wise man the purpose of life, and he told me 'There
are lessons to learn, and gifts to give." More recently I heard
(don't remember who or when) that the purpose of an 'individual life'
was the opportunity to develop compassion. I am much older than you,
but think these two statements are perfect. But I also think
Pirsig's advice to Chris is simple, beautiful and very, very
wise. It is as follows.
"``What should I be when I grow up?
The bird disappears over a far ridge. I don't know what to say.
``Honest,'' I finally say.""
(ZAMM,Chapter 22)
Marsha
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