Hello,
At work stress swallows people into negativity.
This is a daily, nightly event. It is definitely the
moment that brings out the best or the worst in a
person. I try to laugh. It does help relieve the
pressure, not just for myself, but for others around
me. Work is not only political, but intellectual.
The correct decisions are to made, and a pat on the
back is, well, from those higher up in the hierarchy -
doesn't happen 99% of the time. I sometimes think,
with this non-encouragement, am I to except a 'nice
job', 'thanks', or 'your doing this well'. It's
usually can you correct this, or we can't have people
doing that. Even hearing the negativity about others
has me watch my back. You don't know what to say at
times. One wrong word, and many won't help and care
about you. I know I do things at times, that others
wonder 'what the heck was he thinking'. I try to
remember this. It helps. For everybody does with
what they know. I've heard some are just plain lazy
and don't try. Maybe - well, it's probably most
likely true. I still address problems that staff may
be having. I still address problems that residents
are having. I do encourage and say thank you and
please. Yet, so many people talk about each other -
spies lurk. This whole situation demands allegiance,
and if you don't show respect to certain people, well,
don't except it back. Trust, that's my issue. I
don't trust certain people. It's funny. I trust the
residents more than the staff at times, except for a
certain few. At least with the residents, when they
make a mistake or try to lie, it can be dealt with,
discussed openly and then we move on. With staff and
the politics -what I like to call drama, has moved
into the sector of the staff and administration. Why
bother with it? Why think about it? Who cares what
others think? I mean we make mistakes. Why does it
bother me if others talk behind my back? I know I say
things at times, I try not to, but I do. It is
negative and towards certain staff. Everybody grovels
and moans about each other. Where does this get us?
I try to come back to the focus at what we are doing
at work, which is the residents. Then staff do this
or don't do this, and it goes counter to what would
help everything run better for the residents - so the
staff become more the problem than the residents. The
staff aren't helping the residents, but then again we
each have our own way. I guess I should talk with
each staff and support them. If things don't go well,
then I should be here for them in support and guidance
and not have the attitude, "I told you so!" That
doesn't help I guess. Even if I think certain staff
are doing something to help residents or aren't being
on the same page and are going out on their own, well,
if problems arise, then it is their doing. I don't
leave them out to dry, but help them. I don't say, "I
told you so." (which I haven't, but I'm saying I
should trust them more). I can help them out, not
demand I certain way. It's tough. I found a way that
works and helps provide consistent structure for the
residents so the residents don't rule the show. Yet,
there are other ways. There are other honest efforts,
even if they seem so silly and counter to what I've
experienced. If I have to clean up somebodies mess,
then so be it. I'm sure I do things that don't help.
I know I lean on the discipline side. I'm not much of
a talker with the residents especially if they are
doing things wrong that I've or others have repeatedly
called them out on. I'm straightforward in my
approach. It makes some laugh and others think I'm
mean at times. Sometimes I'm seen as too complex, I
make things complicated. I say to these people, your
probably right, and yes, I have said that to people,
staff and residents. When the shit hits the fan,
thus, a crisis is amongst us at work, I know exactly
what needs to be done. I'm clear minded and go right
for the solution. I know I'm strict. When it comes
to talking with the residents, I can laugh and joke
around with them. I really don't like to leave my
assistant supervisor out of the picture. I try to let
her in on everything. It helps me. I have somebody
to talk to about what's happening. When she wonders
if I tell her everything, I'm very plain-spoken with
her and I let her know - yes, I'm telling you
everything and if I'm not, I think what is it I
haven't let her know and I tell her. It helps with my
sanity. She's somebody I know that understands what I
go through. She's been through a lot with residents
wanting to kill her and get rid of her. I've been
there. I know exactly what she's talking about. This
helps her. She knows I've been there, and it's
difficult to rely this experience to others that
haven't been through what we've been through. There
are others on campus, on different units that
understand too. But it's not about this. It's not
about what I know and what others know and may or may
not do measured by my experience. I don't need to
compare. They've got their own way. I should be more
supportive and encouraging. Isn't that what I'm
looking for from others in the first place?
night,
SA
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