SA, I couldn't handle it. People I care about pecking at each other. Pain. It was too much, so I headed for the hills. I send them love, trust, empathy & compassion. I am a coward. You are brave.
Marsha At 10:11 PM 7/6/2007, you wrote: >Hello, > > > At work stress swallows people into negativity. >This is a daily, nightly event. It is definitely the >moment that brings out the best or the worst in a >person. I try to laugh. It does help relieve the >pressure, not just for myself, but for others around >me. Work is not only political, but intellectual. >The correct decisions are to made, and a pat on the >back is, well, from those higher up in the hierarchy - >doesn't happen 99% of the time. I sometimes think, >with this non-encouragement, am I to except a 'nice >job', 'thanks', or 'your doing this well'. It's >usually can you correct this, or we can't have people >doing that. Even hearing the negativity about others >has me watch my back. You don't know what to say at >times. One wrong word, and many won't help and care >about you. I know I do things at times, that others >wonder 'what the heck was he thinking'. I try to >remember this. It helps. For everybody does with >what they know. I've heard some are just plain lazy >and don't try. Maybe - well, it's probably most >likely true. I still address problems that staff may >be having. I still address problems that residents >are having. I do encourage and say thank you and >please. Yet, so many people talk about each other - >spies lurk. This whole situation demands allegiance, >and if you don't show respect to certain people, well, >don't except it back. Trust, that's my issue. I >don't trust certain people. It's funny. I trust the >residents more than the staff at times, except for a >certain few. At least with the residents, when they >make a mistake or try to lie, it can be dealt with, >discussed openly and then we move on. With staff and >the politics -what I like to call drama, has moved >into the sector of the staff and administration. Why >bother with it? Why think about it? Who cares what >others think? I mean we make mistakes. Why does it >bother me if others talk behind my back? I know I say >things at times, I try not to, but I do. It is >negative and towards certain staff. Everybody grovels >and moans about each other. Where does this get us? >I try to come back to the focus at what we are doing >at work, which is the residents. Then staff do this >or don't do this, and it goes counter to what would >help everything run better for the residents - so the >staff become more the problem than the residents. The >staff aren't helping the residents, but then again we >each have our own way. I guess I should talk with >each staff and support them. If things don't go well, >then I should be here for them in support and guidance >and not have the attitude, "I told you so!" That >doesn't help I guess. Even if I think certain staff >are doing something to help residents or aren't being >on the same page and are going out on their own, well, >if problems arise, then it is their doing. I don't >leave them out to dry, but help them. I don't say, "I >told you so." (which I haven't, but I'm saying I >should trust them more). I can help them out, not >demand I certain way. It's tough. I found a way that >works and helps provide consistent structure for the >residents so the residents don't rule the show. Yet, >there are other ways. There are other honest efforts, >even if they seem so silly and counter to what I've >experienced. If I have to clean up somebodies mess, >then so be it. I'm sure I do things that don't help. >I know I lean on the discipline side. I'm not much of >a talker with the residents especially if they are >doing things wrong that I've or others have repeatedly >called them out on. I'm straightforward in my >approach. It makes some laugh and others think I'm >mean at times. Sometimes I'm seen as too complex, I >make things complicated. I say to these people, your >probably right, and yes, I have said that to people, >staff and residents. When the shit hits the fan, >thus, a crisis is amongst us at work, I know exactly >what needs to be done. I'm clear minded and go right >for the solution. I know I'm strict. When it comes >to talking with the residents, I can laugh and joke >around with them. I really don't like to leave my >assistant supervisor out of the picture. I try to let >her in on everything. It helps me. I have somebody >to talk to about what's happening. When she wonders >if I tell her everything, I'm very plain-spoken with >her and I let her know - yes, I'm telling you >everything and if I'm not, I think what is it I >haven't let her know and I tell her. It helps with my >sanity. She's somebody I know that understands what I >go through. She's been through a lot with residents >wanting to kill her and get rid of her. I've been >there. I know exactly what she's talking about. This >helps her. She knows I've been there, and it's >difficult to rely this experience to others that >haven't been through what we've been through. There >are others on campus, on different units that >understand too. But it's not about this. It's not >about what I know and what others know and may or may >not do measured by my experience. I don't need to >compare. They've got their own way. I should be more >supportive and encouraging. Isn't that what I'm >looking for from others in the first place? > > >night, >SA > > > >____________________________________________________________________________________ >Pinpoint customers who are looking for what you sell. >http://searchmarketing.yahoo.com/ >moq_discuss mailing list >Listinfo, Unsubscribing etc. >http://lists.moqtalk.org/listinfo.cgi/moq_discuss-moqtalk.org >Archives: >http://lists.moqtalk.org/pipermail/moq_discuss-moqtalk.org/ >http://moq.org.uk/pipermail/moq_discuss_archive/ moq_discuss mailing list Listinfo, Unsubscribing etc. http://lists.moqtalk.org/listinfo.cgi/moq_discuss-moqtalk.org Archives: http://lists.moqtalk.org/pipermail/moq_discuss-moqtalk.org/ http://moq.org.uk/pipermail/moq_discuss_archive/ moq_discuss mailing list Listinfo, Unsubscribing etc. http://lists.moqtalk.org/listinfo.cgi/moq_discuss-moqtalk.org Archives: http://lists.moqtalk.org/pipermail/moq_discuss-moqtalk.org/ http://moq.org.uk/pipermail/moq_discuss_archive/
