ODE TO METRO GOVERNMENT Minneapolis purists cries we hear, The biliousness is loud and clear. "You use our parks and then don't pay, For you we build the d*mn freeways. Suburbanites, we hate you all! Polluting with your traffic crawl. Fie on you! We take an oath -- We will contain your overgrowth. Urban values, that's our vow! Ask us why, don't ask us how, Unless you want a nasty row."
The suburbs reply, so meek and mild, "We're not your idiot stepchild. We've got the power, we've got the clout, Republicans won in a rout. At the Capitol we'll flex our muscle, For local aid you'll have to hustle. Because your chances are so chancy, You'll have to practice necromancy. To get anything from us at all, Upon your knees you'll have to crawl To us, practitioners of sprawl." That answer has The List offended, And to the first verse is appended: "The NRP has been our Charter, We wish that we had acted smarter. Our revenues past councils squandered, >From our priorities they wandered. The legislature hates us too, To them we seem a needy shrew. If only we knew what to do!" One wonders what will be the lesson, For urbanists this coming session. Will suburban interests prevail, Leaving Minneapolis beyond the pale, . . . How ends this tortured little tale? The ship of state is on the shoals, We need to find our common goals, Not enemies, we're brothers metro-ly, Hang together, or we'll hang separately. Some say that to curb our spending, Our jurisdictions should be blending. Republicans and DFLers, Be reasonable and decent fellers. While for funding we've all vied, The metro cities fates are tied. Work together! Yes, we must, Or our budgets we will bust. You might think that I'm delirious, But never have I been more serious. Have these poor lines made an impression? Tell me, have we learned our lesson? Or with the numbers will they keep messin'? Stay tuned for the end-of-session. With my deepest apologies, Barbara Nelson Burnsville Once and former Minneapolitan _______________________________________ Minneapolis Issues Forum - A City-focused Civic Discussion - Mn E-Democracy Post messages to: mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Subscribe, Unsubscribe, Digest, and more: http://e-democracy.org/mpls
