How I Cheat
I'm forever borrowing scripts and remaking them, impressing big important
people with my programming ability when I have none at all.
A few tiny bounce commands when an avatar comes near and I have a super
fantastic interactive installation.
Particle physics gone just a bit amuck makes it look like I crafted models
of black holes and Large Hadron Collider targets.
Weird twangy objects make everything look lumpy and complicated just like
the early pre-galactic universe.
Importing abject and bizarre body textures makes silly shapes appear
really risky and out of control.
Borrowing terms from psychoanalysis and science gives my stuff a legitima-
ted edge.
A few wobbly movements and it seems as if I've taken physics in hand and
bent it to my purpose.
Taking down buildings and other stuff and calling it deconstruction gives
it theory-advantage.
Endless advertising pumps up my things like inflationary universes in
their own tiny bubbles.
Referencing other artworks by not referencing other artworks is so cool I
gain panache.
Keeping words out of the installations makes them appear mysterious and
dark.
Making things slightly transparent increases their complexity without
really doing anything much.
Letting stuff rotate beyond raster limits makes movement appear incredibly
sophisticated instead of it being just the inability of video-cards to
keep up.
Obscure names for shows act like ultra-cool sunglasses hiding nothing
much to see.
Confessing pain and obsession creates empathy and guilt in an otherwise
critical audience.
Networking makes me seem like a real know-it-all who knows it all.
There's nothing like an avatar jumping about to make it appear that I'm a
master at script-writing.
Leaving some stuff unfinished shows what a busy creature I am.
Weird sound creates shortcuts to making environments out of very little.
Silence gives things a deep conceptual edge.
Making stuff transparent so avatars bump into it gives an illusion of
control and brilliant but invisible architecture.
Just build something as big as possible and it seems like you're a master
of a virtual universe.
Never imitating 'real' objects creates the feeling of real unworldliness
as if the alien is under my command.
Ending lists like these abruptly makes it appear that I have so much to
say I don't really know when to stop.
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