Stardate 20951.1
To:
Dr. Vuzek
Director, Anthropological Institute

Dr. Vuzek, I hope all is well with you and your pliwus.
Here is a short interim report on what has been going on here lately.

In what was to have been a simple replication, under the same
guise, of a study run by my predecessor Narok a few
uptols ago, I unwittingly antagonized my subjects.
Narok made his name by successfully combining two studies
in one, shortening by irmols his stay on ths Xenu-forsaken planet.
(Did you catch that reference?  Look it up in Narok's dissertation.)

But I try the same thing and it's like stirring up a nest of
flying hrvola beetles.  I know this is a taboo-beset planet,
but they keep creating *new* ones.
Were Narok still alive, he would be fascinated with this new
taboo they call "cross-posting", which has sprung up in one
of their electromagnetic-based forms of communication.

At first I thought this might have something to do with their
ancient form of torture, in which a man is tied to a post,
his arms immobilized on a cross-piece, or maybe with
a talisman that figures in their Drakul legends.
But this seems not to be the case.  I think I am near a
breakthrough with one of my informants, who is trying
valiantly to explain the relevant terms.  Once we understand
the vocabulary, perhaps we can work out the taboo 
cross-correlations in some form as simple as a spreadsheet.
Hey, did I just say "cross"-correlations?
Aha, maybe that's the key to--- nah, let's not get our hopes up.

This study reminds me every egpol of the old adage that
anthropological fieldwork is hard and frustrating --
so frustrating that sometimes I want to spray my own
subjects with a stiff blast of qak-hilp.
Yeah, yeah, I know, Prime Directive and all that.  Don't worry.

I sure wish I were back on the home planet with my 
Forak and pilt'has.  
A full report will follow.
Kelba Gimpa!

P.S. Since we're dealing with taboos about permitted and
forbidden destinations for messages, it sure would be
ironic if through force of habit I sent my message to you,
to them.  But don't worry, I'm very careful about that.
If that ever happened, I'd have to fall on my bat'leth.

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