Brilliant satire, Mark! I ought to cross-post this to not_honyaku_redux...
Alan Siegrist Orinda, CA, USA Mark Spahn wrote: > Stardate 20951.1 > To: > Dr. Vuzek > Director, Anthropological Institute > > Dr. Vuzek, I hope all is well with you and your pliwus. > Here is a short interim report on what has been going on here lately. > > In what was to have been a simple replication, under the same guise, of a > study run by my predecessor Narok a few uptols ago, I unwittingly > antagonized my subjects. > Narok made his name by successfully combining two studies in one, > shortening by irmols his stay on ths Xenu-forsaken planet. (Did you catch > that reference? Look it up in Narok's dissertation.) > > But I try the same thing and it's like stirring up a nest of flying hrvola > beetles. I know this is a taboo-beset planet, but they keep creating > *new* ones. > Were Narok still alive, he would be fascinated with this new taboo they > call "cross-posting", which has sprung up in one of their electromagnetic- > based forms of communication. > > At first I thought this might have something to do with their ancient form > of torture, in which a man is tied to a post, his arms immobilized on a > cross-piece, or maybe with a talisman that figures in their Drakul legends. > But this seems not to be the case. I think I am near a breakthrough with > one of my informants, who is trying valiantly to explain the relevant > terms. Once we understand the vocabulary, perhaps we can work out the > taboo cross-correlations in some form as simple as a spreadsheet. > Hey, did I just say "cross"-correlations? > Aha, maybe that's the key to--- nah, let's not get our hopes up. > > This study reminds me every egpol of the old adage that anthropological > fieldwork is hard and frustrating -- so frustrating that sometimes I want > to spray my own subjects with a stiff blast of qak-hilp. > Yeah, yeah, I know, Prime Directive and all that. Don't worry. > > I sure wish I were back on the home planet with my Forak and pilt'has. > A full report will follow. > Kelba Gimpa! > > P.S. Since we're dealing with taboos about permitted and forbidden > destinations for messages, it sure would be ironic if through force of > habit I sent my message to you, to them. But don't worry, I'm very > careful about that. If that ever happened, I'd have to fall on my bat'leth. --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Persons posting messages to not_honyaku assume all responsibility for their messages. The list owner does not review messages prior to posting, and accepts no responsibility for the content of messages posted. -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
