On Wed, Aug 28, 2002, Ralf S. Engelschall wrote: > On Wed, Aug 28, 2002, Michael Schloh von Bennewitz wrote: >>> 1.0 already did this, now we can talk about past, I think >>> [...] >>> -of software deployment is taking form. >>> +of software deployment took form. >> >> Then consider the followinig altered paragraph: >> >> A flexible and powerful software packaging facility, OpenPKG eased the >> cross-platform installation and administration of Unix software. >> As it consolidated different vendor approaches into a unified architecture, >> it served system administrators of large networks previously burdened >> by non-conformant systems. OpenPKG leveraged proven technologies like >> Red Hat Package Manager (RPM) and provided an additional system layer >> on top of the operating system. With OpenPKG, a new and unique method >> of software deployment took form. >> >> Sounds schwulisch? Of course, because it's written in past tense. If you want >> to break the consistency of the paragraph, then finish it off with the past >> tense. Otherwise, I recommend that we back the change out. > > Hmmm.. I don't want to break anything, but without past tense it IMHO > reads like we now start with this unique method, but OpenPKG already was > unique and now got even better. So what to do now?
The consistent text may make a few people think that OpenPKG was old hat.
However, it will give even more people the impression that OpenPKG *was* and
*is* providing admins with a 'new and unique method'. I think that the text is
not only better due to consistency, but it also causes a more positive
psychological reaction. A change in tense or tone can do that.
These alternatives are all equally good, [2] being my favorite:
A flexible and powerful software packaging facility, OpenPKG eases the
cross-platform installation and administration of Unix software.
Consolidating different vendor approaches into a unified architecture,
it serves system administrators of large networks previously burdened
by non-conformant systems. OpenPKG leverages proven technologies like
Red Hat Package Manager (RPM) and provides an additional system layer
on top of the operating system. [0]With OpenPKG, a new and unique method
of software deployment is taking form.
[1]Administrators are increasingly using OpenPKG, a new and unique method of
software deployment.
[2]Administrators view OpenPKG as a new and unique method of software
deployment, and use it to curb the complexity of their systems.
[3]OpenPKG is turning heads, as more administrators are considering such a new
and unique method of software deployment for thier systems.
--
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Development Team, Application Services
Cable & Wireless Deutschland GmbH
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