You actually read the content of the page? ... hehe... I terus "view source". I'm American, so English is my first language. I can probably make suggestions as to what sounds natural to me. Disclaimer: No one has ever accused me of being a good public speaker :) ...
On Sun, Apr 17, 2011 at 8:26 PM, Raja Iskandar Shah <[email protected] > wrote: > quick review > > english grammar correction > > *Innovating the Change * > *Does not sound right... perhaps it should be Innovating Change ?* > I agree > > What is MOSC ? > > MOSC is an event where you can learn how to maximize value from Open > Source software for your organization, and meet world class speakers from > around the world. Now is the time for Innovating the Change! > Why you should Attend ? > > MOSC provides exposure and knowledge on the importance of OSS, share > amongst the open source community on new directions and latest innovations, > share and exchange views, ideas, and tools on the latest trends and issues > of OSS. > > *Sounds confused - maybe you should just list 3 or 5 specifics eg* > > - *Realising cost benefits* > - *Making your application scalable to millions > * > - *Securing your implementation* > - *Rapid application development and frameworks > * > - *Technologies, innovations, trends, challenges and lemons* > > If there's a question mark at the end, then it needs to be "Why should you attend?" (the "you" comes after "should"). "Why you should attend" is a statement and would be followed by an ellipsis if it's used properly, but this section is all phrased as questions. Why does it say "join" instead of "attend" when I look at the page right now? Is it being changed right now? ... I think that "attend" is a better word in this context than "join", but don't forget that my English is American and your English (according to the language property of the HTML element) is British. A British guy might say "join" is better. I hate lists. I like it better when people talk to me. Here's my suggestion... *Why should you attend?* At MOSC, you will have the opportunity to meet and learn from world-class speakers who will present their ideas on the importance and benefits of Open Source Software. You will have the opportunity to learn how OSS can help your organization to increase profits and productivity while reducing cost. You will be able to meet with speakers and participants to discuss and collaborate on the latest innovations, technologies, and trends in OSS. > *Looking at past conferences, security has been a good crowd puller, the > php shootout on framework crowd was also good. cloud computing is popular > now coz people want to know how to easily scale to millions, trends etc is > so-so lah... but still needed*.* i think these are the reasons that an ict > administrator / office / technician would need so that their boss will > approve the rm500 ticket. * > > *Who Should Attend ? * > Open Source developers, communities, enterprenuers, inventors, evangelist, > researchers, strategist > Business executives from local and multi-national companies > Government officers > Students, general public > Tiada salam ... Like I said, I like it when people talk to me rather than give me a list. All developers should attend, whether they currently use OSS or not. As we already know, all developers should use OSS :) "communities" is a very general term that doesn't fit in this context. It's not a "who" that answers the question, it's a "what". You could say "community representatives" to answer "who", but it still doesn't say what kind of community. You misspelled entrepreneurs. The word "inventors" is usually associated with people who create physical objects rather than abstract things like software or social networks. In IT, inventors are entrepreneurs, so the term is redundant. The word "evangelist" without other qualifiers is usually associated with people who aggressively spread their religious beliefs. Even when it's used to describe free software evangelists, it emphasizes the negative aspect of the personality... the pushiness. There are many different kinds of strategist<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategist>, but they wouldn't all be interested in OSS. We want to target "IT Strategists". You forgot one of the most important types of people... educators! :) So... *Who Should Attend? *MOSC will have information on topics that should appeal to all members of the general public. However, we'll cover topics of particular interest to software developers, entrepreneurs, researchers, educators, students, company owners and business executives, government officers, and IT strategists. -- *Ghodmode* http://www.ghodmode.com/blog > For the slideshow on get your seats now... it may be better to show filled > audiences. using an image of empty seats... well, it does not make me want > to buy a ticket (except for maybe for kesian..) > > Add the date in the content body and the countdown.. at the moment it is in > the images - search engines will find it hard to read the date from the > image > > Need to have page on past conferences : this is important for sponsors. > > I wonder if adding a diaspora network be attractive to create a buzz ? > > > > > On Sun, Apr 17, 2011 at 1:28 PM, Harisfazillah Jamel < > [email protected]> wrote: > >> Thanks. Sedang dibincangkan dalam MOSC2011 list. Ada cadangan >> penggunaan extension. >> >> Kami akan update. >> >> On Sun, Apr 17, 2011 at 12:42 PM, Ahmad Amran <[email protected]> wrote: >> > Guna iphone , tak dapat convert ke full version. Mungkin cookie problem? >> > >> > Sent from my phone >> > >> > -- To unsubscribe from and detail about this group http://portal.mosc.my/osdc-my-mailing-list-information MOSC2011 http://fb.me/mosc2011 and http://portal.mosc.my/
