Barbara and Tonnie, In response to your question of disasters or situations where we feel more could have happened, I'm re-sending a story I posted three years ago that completely changed my Open Space practice.
Ironically, this is the story that launched the shift from defending space to being co-creative in how I hold it that I discussed in my last post. Peggy On Nov 16, 2009, at 5:56 AM, Barbara Bunker wrote: > I think that this very interesting conversation is moving from disasters to > situations where we feel that more could have happened....sometimes because we > didn't do all that we might have done in the contracting or in the event > itself > or...?????? B3 > > Barbara Bunker Begin forwarded message: > From: Peggy Holman <pe...@opencirclecompany.com> > Date: August 23, 2006 9:01:49 PM PDT > To: osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu > Subject: [OSLIST] Breaking Open (long) > Reply-To: OSLIST <osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu> > > > During the last week of June, I hosted what turned out to be the most > personally challenging work Ive done in a very long time. In fact, Id say > it broke me open, in a difficult but valuable way. The primary gift was a > move from a defensive stand around Open Space to a co-creative stand. Ill > say more about what this means and how I got there by sharing the story of > what it was like to hold space for Philanthropy, Love, and Evolution (also > known as the Philanthropy Salon). My intent is not so much to share the > story of the conference, but rather, the story of facilitating the conference. > > To begin at the beginning > the signs that this would be different were there > right from the start. You know that thing about every group saying, were > different?, well, based on my experience, transformational philanthropy > philanthropy intended to make a substantive difference in how systems (e.g., > health care, education, media, etc.) themselves work really is different! > But, that shall unfold > . > > The idea for the gathering was born in May, 2005, when Michael Dowd, Tom > Atlee, and I hosted the first Evolutionary Salon. At the end of the > gathering, one of our agreements was to host some strategic conversations, > bringing an evolutionary world view (Ill share some background on this in > another posting) to different high leverage fields. We decided to start with > philanthropists. In September, 2005, we each reached out to people we knew > in the field to ask their counsel on how best to reach this audience. On a > conference call, we were met with enthusiastic support. People jumped in, > saying > we should do x, lets try y > in other words rather than telling > us what WE needed to do, our counselors enlisted themselves in the work! > Seemed like an auspicious beginning, as they agreed to become our planning > group. > > Over the next few weeks, we drafted an invitation and identified the > well-respected, well-networked leaders in the field of transformational > philanthropy. Our planning team thought it looked great > until they > realized that the invitations would be coming from them. Suddenly, it wasnt > quite right. We went back to the drawing board, getting clearer about the > purpose of the gathering. We wrote another invitation and were met with > another stepping back. > > Hmmm > .I wondered, is there a pattern here? On our next call, I asked > about this approach-avoid pattern. I was clear to come from a place of > curiosity and non-attachment. After some self-reflection, people > acknowledged this as a cultural characteristic (understandable when, as one > said, everyone has an opinion on the best way you should spend your money). > Still, it was something of a turning point. The next version of the > invitation took and inviting began in earnest. It was slow at the > beginning, but as it became the place to be, we ultimately reached the > capacity of our facility with just the sort of mix of folks we had envisioned > coming together. > > As the date grew closer, I had my second cultural surprise: more participants > contacted me with opinions and requests about how the gathering should be > designed than Ive ever experienced before. In retrospect, I can describe > some of the other cultural characteristics that I believe were at play. > First, most of these folks spend their professional lives in facilitated > conversations. They are VERY sophisticated about process. And since > transformational philanthropy has something of a spiritual aspect to it, most > of them have done deep personal work. Many were used to processes that took > them into spaces of intimate, collective connection. Some of the > participants I talked with before the gathering were familiar with Open > Space, and didnt think much of it (more on this in another posting). > Secondly, though sophisticated, I found some odd blind spots. My hunch is > that this is a group of people, who are among the powerful that many have > trouble speaking truth to (as in speaking truth to power). I suspect they > may be sheltered from the uncomfortable or the difficult even if that isnt > their preference. Finally, while the facilitator is ALWAYS in service to the > group, most groups unconsciously cede their power to the facilitator. This > is a group that fully understands that the facilitator serves at their > pleasure. Again, this didnt truly come clear to me until the meeting > itself. > > From the half-dozen or so conversations I had with participants prior to the > gathering, there were two issues that were most clearly expressed: the need > to go deep and the need for agreements so that there was a sense of safety > for marginalized voices. (Thanks to one of the planning group, we had a > wonderful mix of people of color and youth present.) As is often the case > when working with people who want to fill the space with planned processes, I > was highly protective of the space. Tom described me as a mama bear. > > As I started to appreciate the demands of this group, I was glad to have some > highly skilled partners for the hosting: Thomas Hurley, Juanita Brown and Tom > Atlee. As we began discussing specifics, they made it clear that they would > do their best to support me. Though it was not the design that they would > have used given a clean slate, they were there to make it work. I made the > choice that we would not begin in Open Space for several reasons: > > Our experiences of the 2nd and 3rd salons made it clear that we needed to set > some context with the evolutionary story. > There were enough participants that I knew were hostile to Open Space that I > wanted to start with something more familiar to them (BTW, as I checked into > it, several had experienced multiple day OS gatherings with OS practitioners > that I respected, so it wasnt a case of inexperienced support) > My hosting partners had gifts to contribute to the mix > I had sufficient clues to know I was dealing with a culture that I didnt > understand. Since I was working with people who were familiar with the > culture, I knew I needed to trust their counsel. (The planning stretched us > all as we made room for each others very different beliefs about > facilitation.) > > We had the luxury of time - an evening, and 4.5 days. We agreed that before > going into Open Space, we had two pre-requisites: go deep creating a strong > sense of intimacy and community, and ground people in the evolutionary story > (a lesson from the second and third evolutionary salons) so that when we > opened the space, we would go broad from depth. I was actually quite excited > by this, suspecting that with the diverse mix of people present, that deep > connection would increase the likelihood for breakthrough. On the issue of > agreements, I argued that this would work itself out in the Open Space, so we > didnt take it on directly. > > The first evening, people introduced themselves by taking a courageous love > name. (This was inspired by two sources: the etymology of philanthropy > loving humanity (or more loosely, loving service); and something wed done at > Spirited Work one season. Wed chosen warrior names. In the spirit of a > broader understanding of philanthropy, rather than warrior names, people took > a courageous love name. Mine, which I have used since taking it as my > warrior name at Spirited Work, is Standing Still in the Fire. Little did I > know that I would have quite the opportunity to live into my name! > > Following this step into intimacy, what was supposed to be a 60 minute > presentation on evolution by a cosmologist, ran way over. While it contained > beautiful animations of galaxies from the Hubble, there was enough technical > information and it was late enough at night, that it turned out not to be the > inspiring introduction to the story of evolution that we had expected. > (Something that Juanita and Thomas had been VERY concerned about.) When it > was over, I said to Thomas, that while I knew he would find no satisfaction > in it, he had been right about not doing the presentation in the evening.) > > Following this mixed beginning, Juanita, Thomas, Tom, and I met and concluded > that we should re-think our plans for the next day. The location of the > gathering, Gold Lake, is very special land. Traditionally a gathering place > for Native American tribes to put aside their weapons and meet in peace, this > land and its native populations were ravaged by settlers when gold was found > nearby. Its current stewards are working to honor and restore its special > energy to support efforts that heal and transform the world. We began the > first full day by offering some reflective questions to people and sent them > out to connect with the land and each other, using the questions as they > wished. > > When they returned, Juanita was to host a World Café intended to begin > connecting philanthropy and evolution. As she introduced the question for > the café, one of the young people, Evon, a man who had been chief of his > Alaskan tribe, spoke. He was respectful and articulate and named his > discomfort with evolution, a term which wed incorporated into the question > being used for the café. More than this discomfort, he was raising the > question of safe space (remember that pre-conference warning that we needed > to create agreements? I hadnt counted on this being an issue before the > space was opened!). Juanita handled the situation with grace, ultimately > handing the leadership to Evon and a partner with whom he worked, angel to > create safe space. We moved back into a council circle and they led a circle > in which people could say whatever they felt they needed to say for the space > to be open for their voices. While this was frustrating to those who wanted > to get to the content (and they voiced this), it seemed to accomplish its > purpose. > > When Juanita, Thomas, Tom and I met after this circle, we agreed it was time > to open the space. One other factor now entered the situation for me. We > were at 8,500 feet of elevation. I discovered that I couldnt get more than > 3 hours of sleep each night. And Im an 8-hour-a-night kind of person. I > was well aware of being far less centered than I usually am when opening > space. > > Tuesday morning, I opened the space. Something occurred that has never > happened to me in the 12 years of space holding. The group rebelled. They > were quite adamant that they wanted to stay together until they had a common > grounding in both the state of transformational philanthropy and an > understanding of the evolutionary story. I said that all they needed to do > was post the sessions and it would be clear by how people negotiated at the > agenda wall and how they used their two feet if they all wanted to stay > together. They rejected this; I stepped back and watched as a debate ensued > over whether to do a fish bowl, a world café, or some other form to handle > their desire to stay together. As I witnessed this, I was mostly marveling > over the passion of this group as it clearly took charge of its needs. After > about 45 minutes, the group fragmented into lots of small conversations. At > that point, I made the one choice that in retrospect, I see as my attachment > to things. It was an impulse based in my Spirited Work culture I got up, > asked for silence, said Id ring a bell and when they came out of silence, > they would know what to do. When the sound of the bell just ended, one of > the participants, who was sitting directly across from me, looked straight at > me and said they were doing just fine, thank you and that my ringing of the > bell was completely out of order. I felt seared by his words. I was > standing still in the fire and I got cooked. Shortly after that, another > participant said that he thought they should do what I had suggested post > their sessions and see what people were interested in. And thats what they > did. Vindication of sorts. They did stay as a group for the afternoon, with > two powerful sessions, one on how the field of transformational philanthropy > had evolved, followed by a session that finally provided some insight into > what the evolutionary world view had to offer to philanthropy. > > That evening, one of the participants hosted an extraordinary storytelling > session that took people into very intimate connection with each other. The > design was simple: Tell a story of personal transformation. People had 3-4 > minutes for their stories. A bell was sounded at 3 minutes and again at 4 > minutes. There was a talking object, so whoever wished to speak could do so > when they were ready to tell their story. > > It took 2 days before most folks talked to me. I realized that in process > work terms, Id played an important role, making it completely clear who was > in charge - them. I was basically fine with what had taken place, still, it > was definitely took some deep breathing to be at peace with it all. I spent > much of the time over the rest of the gathering making amends with the people > who had called me before the gathering, letting them know that I realized > that I needed to work with them in a co-creative way rather than simply > defending the space. As an example of what I mean by this, on the last day > of the OS, one of the participants approached me with a common request in > multiple day Open Spaces they wanted people to say more than a title for > their sessions so that they had a better understanding of what the sessions > were about. My traditional stance for this is to encourage them to talk to > the convener to find out more. This time, when we began the morning > postings, I named the request and the tension the more time describing > sessions, the less time to be in them. I said they were adults and could > make their choices knowing this was the tradeoff. I felt this honored the > request and the space. It seemed to work. > > This is how I am thinking about what it means to be co-creative: Identify > what, if any, tensions exist between the request and keeping the space open > and then work with the requester to create a response that respects both. > > By the end of the conference, a number of the participants talked about it as > a landmark event. When Michael, Tom and I had discussed our desire for this > gathering before it began, that had been our highest aspiration. No matter > how personally challenging it was, the outcome was all that I could have > wanted > and more. > > Unlike most Open Spaces, I actually wrote a report: > http://www.co-intelligence.org/PhilanthropyES2006.html > > > > Stay tuned for: > > · The perceptions of Open Space by some of the folks I met > · The evolutionary world view (as offered in the context > of its relationship to conversation) > > > BTW, one other cultural characteristic of philanthropists they live their > lives as butterflies, holding many, many private sessions. > > ________________________________ > Peggy Holman > The Open Circle Company > 15347 SE 49th Place > Bellevue, WA 98006 > (425) 746-6274 > www.opencirclecompany.com > > For pre-orders with a 20% discount on the new edition of The Change Handbook, > go to: > www.bkconnection.com/ChangeHandbook > > "An angel told me that the only way to step into the fire and not get burnt, > is to become > the fire". > -- Drew Dellinger > > * * ========================================================== > osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu ------------------------------ To subscribe, > unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of > osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu: > http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about > OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs: http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist * * ========================================================== osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs: http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist
