On 26 Feb 2022, at 21:09, Mark Carmel via OSList
<[email protected]> wrote:
*ENGLISH Mensa Invitational - for lexophiles*
*The Washington Post Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to
take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting,
or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.**Here are the
winners:
*
*-------------------------------------------------
*1.* Cashtration* (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the
subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2.* Ignoranus*: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3.* Intaxicaton*: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until
you realize it was your money to start with.
4.* Reintarnation*: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5.* Bozone* (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6.* Foreploy*:Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
getting laid.
7.* Giraffiti*: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
8.* Sarchasm*: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person who doesn't get it.
9.* Inoculatte*: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10.* Osteopornosis*: A degenerate disease.*(*This one got extra credit)
11.* Karmageddon*: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these
really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's
like, a serious bummer.
12.* Decafalon*(n):Thegrueling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.
13.* Glibido*: All talk and no action.
14.* Dopeler Effect*: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
when they come at you rapidly.
15.* Arachnoleptic Fit* (n.): The frantic dance performed just after
you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
16.* Beelzebug* (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into
your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
*
*17.* Caterpallor* (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm
in the fruit you're eating.
*The WashingtonPost has also published the winning submissions to its
yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate
meanings for common words.
And the winners are:
*1.* Coffee*, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
2.* Flabbergasted*,adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one
has gained.
3. *A**bdicate*, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4.* Esplanade*, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.
5.* Willy-nilly*, adj. Impotent.
6.* Negligent*, adj. Absent mindedly answering the door when wearing
only a nightgown.
7.* Lymph*, v. To walk with a lisp.
8.* Gargoyle*, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.
9.* Flatulence*, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has
been run over by a steamroller.
10.* Balderdash*, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
11.* Testicle*, n. A humorous question on an exam.
12.* Rectitude*, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by
proctologists.
13. *Pokemon*, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.
14. *Oyster*, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with
Yiddishisms.
15. *Frisbeetarianism*, n. The belief that, after death, the soul
flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. *Circumvent*, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by
Jewish men.
_._,_._,_
_______________________________________________
OSList mailing list
To post send emails to [email protected]
To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected]
To subscribe or manage your subscription click below:
http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org
Past archives can be viewed here:
http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]
