Re: [ozmidwifery] Re: [Children Present at Births)

[Aviva Sheb'a]

good one. another aspect I hadn't thought of but Kerry Gray, who was then president of childbirth ed. assoc. did think of...she bought a new to-shirt for Leslie and gave it to him during labour, to wear so he felt special too. He loved that to-shirt and wore it till there was nothing left of it. aviva ----- Original Message ----- From: Larry & Megan To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Monday, November 25, 2002 1:37 PM Subject: RE: [ozmidwifery] Re: [Children Present at Births) We planned on having out two sons present at the birth at home of number three, boys were 3 1/2years and just under two. I showed them the video of number two being born, water birh at home, we watched it lots and also some other videos our midwife lent us. I told them about the noise I might make and about how not to talk when I was concentrating on the baby coming out. Likened it to having to concentrate when driving the car and looking for a carpark, can't talk much then either. I told them it might hurt me, but it was a special hurt just for helping babies to come out. I told them it had to come out between my legs, a special whole that only mummies have, boys don't have one. Daddy would be rubbing my back and helping me and the baby. Importantly you need to arrange a person/s for the children, someone they trust and they need to support your philosophies of childbirth, you don't want their fear coming into your birth. My husband wasn't as keen as I was, but he agreed to take it as it came. I also told them that I might want to be on my own and they may have to go for a walk or to grandma's. I acknowledged that this could upset them and hence affect my labour, but figured I would allow half an hour extra in labour for this to be worked through(not scientifically based).Birth can take a while so children will probably want other things to do. You have to accept that may not even like to be there at the time, nothing is set in concrete. It helps if they are involved with the pregnancy, attending appointments if in hospital or helping the midwife if at home. Kids just love the tools of a midwife, fundal measurements might be a bit out though if they help. Some good books are "Having a Baby" by Jenni Overend and also the writer of "Maisie Mouse" series has one about introducing a new sibling etc, (sorry don't know the name). Lots of talking, my youngest wasn't that interested, but the older boy new all about the placenta and unbilical cord, he loved the blood and mess. After all my education, baby decided to enter the world in the middle of the night and the boys slept right through it all. We woke the eldest up a couple of hours later to help cut the cord. Little one didn't wake til usual time. It was a fast and demanding labour so it was appropriate that the boys weren't there, I believe I wouldn't have coped as well, things happen for a reason. My oldest, now 4 1/4 years thinks I should have another baby so as our midwife can visit us again and so as he can be awake to see the birth this time. I love this, but dad's not to keen. He offered to pay the midwife just to visit, no baby. So I don't think it matters how old other children are, just prepare them as best you can for the birth and enjoy the time. Cheers Megan.