Ann I do understand the trials of lowe supply and continual expressing etc.
However you inferred that it might ??be better than abuse. With my second
child I had low supply and post natal depression and I remember clearly
bying into to the whole if I were a better mother I wouldnt use a dummy.
This child lived at my breast. From him on I realised that my children love
sucking, my five year old still wrecks his t shirts by chewing sucking onm
them and he was an easy much loved baby who fed two hourly for 18months
which I loved owing to my poor previous experience. In the big picture I
think we should judge less and support more. what we do we do with love. I
think dogmatic ideologies of good and bad is as bad when presented by the
medical profession as it is by midwives or well meaning women.
Belinda
----- Original Message -----
From: "Ann green" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Wednesday, February 26, 2003 9:53 AM
Subject: Re: [ozmidwifery] thumb or dummy!?


> Dear Belinda,
> I was not trying to be offensive.I was trying to say
> that if a baby was crying that it was better to give a
> dummy than the parents becoming frustrated and harming
> the child.This does not mean that parents using
> dummies are lazy.I was blessed to have babies that had
> enough suckling at the breast(or a bottle of E.B.M
> which was needed for babes 4,5, and 6 for between 4-6
> months until they were able to feed at the breast,a
> long hard haul for everyone -imagine expressing milk
> for this amount of time with no idea of when it will
> finish, sorry off the topic)Ann--- Belinda Maier
> <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Ann the better than
> abuse thing is very offensive.
> > My children have
> > breastfed for >two years are smart loved and
> > emotionally well developed.
> > They also had dummies apart from my two year old who
> > sucks her thumb. They
> > all had a strong desire to suck and the dummy gave
> > them comfort as well as
> > the two and more hour feeding at the breastfed my
> > children also have healthy
> > teeth. I am not slack or abusive and it really
> > annoys me when judgements are
> > made about dummies thumbs to use or not based on
> > what one does for ones own.
> > Choices are choices based on what a woman feels is
> > best for her child.
> > Michel ODent wrote an article on transcendental
> > objects and said that their
> > use is actually a sign of emotional stability,
> > feeling ok enough to form
> > attachments to such things. I used to allow myself
> > to be made to feel bad as
> > a mother because of my eldest use of a dummy, then
> > my close friends son died
> > of a brain tumour at two years old and her older
> > daughter who had never used
> > a dummy (because she bought into the whole its such
> > a bad mothering thing to
> > do) started to use one and did so until she was nine
> > years old. She now says
> > there are more important things about mothering than
> > stressing about what
> > others think you should be doing. By the way her
> > daughters teeth are
> > fine.The whole I.Q. research needs to be closely
> > looked at for methodology
> > and socioeconomic status of participants, parenting
> > styles etc for it to be
> > worth generalising. I get really fed up with peoples
> > discourses of good
> > mother bad mother, it brings down the confidence of
> > many a "good" mother.
> > Belinda, mother
> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: "Ann green" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
> > To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
> > Sent: Monday, February 24, 2003 10:10 AM
> > Subject: Re: [ozmidwifery] thumb or dummy!?
> >
> >
> > > Dear List,
> > > Research was suppose to have shown that the use of
> > > dummies was associated with a lower I.Q.I have not
> > > used a dummy but understand that for some parents
> > it
> > > might be a better choice than abuse.None of my 6
> > > children have sucked thumbs either!Ann --- Jo
> > Slamen
> > > <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Thumbs
> > > allegedly don't affect teeth unless still in
> > > > use at the age of permanent teeth coming
> > through.
> > > > My teeth are straight (no orthodontic work) and
> > I
> > > > was a thumb sucker - so much so that I had a
> > callous
> > > > on my thumb as a young child - stopped when I
> > > > started primary school.
> > > >
> > > > My almost 4yo also a thumb child - his baby
> > teeth
> > > > are pretty ok looking and I find his thumb use
> > is
> > > > still useful for going to bed and getting him to
> > > > sleep.
> > > >
> > > > Would also imagine trying to swap baby to a
> > dummy
> > > > probably won't work.  I would relax about the
> > thumb
> > > > - does not indicate any emotional problems and
> > it's
> > > > likely to be in use for comfort rather than
> > teething
> > > > too, I believe.
> > > >
> > > > And just to add some personal bias I think
> > thumbs
> > > > look better than dummies too!
> > > >
> > > > Jo Slamen
> > > >   ----- Original Message -----
> > > >   From: J Stewart
> > > >   To: ozmid
> > > >   Cc: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
> > > >   Sent: Monday, February 24, 2003 12:12 AM
> > > >   Subject: [ozmidwifery] thumb or dummy!?
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >   Dear List(s)!
> > > >
> > > >   Just looking for a little bit of general
> > advice on
> > > > an old debate!
> > > >   I have a six month old baby cousin [very
> > cute!]
> > > > she has taken to sucking her thumb as she is
> > > > starting to get some toothy pegs! and her mum is
> > not
> > > > in favour of giving her a dummy. I was wondering
> > > > what opinions are on this? I would think that
> > > > sucking thumbs could effect tooth development
> > and
> > > > the direction/position in which they grow, as
> > well
> > > > as forming a hard to kick habbit in todlers, but
> > > > have also heard interesting points against
> > dummies.
> > > >
> > > >   Any thoughts!?
> > > >
> > > >   Thanks in advance!
> > > >   Jessica.
> > > >
> > >
> > > __________________________________________________
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