Lars Eggert has entered the following ballot position for
draft-ietf-lsr-pce-discovery-security-support-11: Discuss

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DISCUSS:
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# GEN AD review of draft-ietf-lsr-pce-discovery-security-support-11

CC @larseggert

## Discuss

### Section 4, paragraph 3
```
     Section 4 of [RFC5088] states that no new sub-TLVs will be added to
     the PCED TLV, and no new PCE information will be carried in the
     Router Information LSA.  This document updates [RFC5088] by allowing
     the two sub-TLVs defined in this document to be carried in the PCED
     TLV advertised in the Router Information LSA.

     Section 4 of [RFC5089] states that no new sub-TLVs will be added to
     the PCED TLV, and no new PCE information will be carried in the
     Router CAPABLITY TLV.  This document updates [RFC5089] by allowing
     the two sub-TLVs defined in this document to be carried in the PCED
     TLV advertised in the Router CAPABILITY TLV.

     This introduction of additional sub-TLVs should be viewed as an
     exception to the [RFC5088][RFC5089] policy, justified by the
     requirement to discover the PCEP security support prior to
     establishing a PCEP session.  The restrictions defined in
     [RFC5089][RFC5089] should still be considered to be in place.
```
(This is mostly for discussion on the telechat, and I expect to clear
during the call.)

Why were 5088/89 so strict on not allowing new sub-TLVs? This seems
quite unusual for IETF specs. I'm not arguing that this document
can't update those earlier RFCs to allow these new sub-TLVs, but it
seems odd to do so and in the same sentence say "the restrictions
should still be considered in place."

### Section 8.2, paragraph 1
```
     The PCED sub-TLVs were defined in [RFC5088] and [RFC5089], but they
     did not create a registry for it.  This document requests IANA to
     create a new registry called "PCED sub-TLV type indicators" under the
     "Interior Gateway Protocol (IGP) Parameters" grouping.  The
     registration policy for this registry is "IETF Review" [RFC8126].
     Values in this registry come from the range 0-65535.
```
Should the registration policy not be stricter (e.g., Standards
Action?) given that 5088/89 didn't even allow any new values?


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COMMENT:
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## Comments

### Inclusive language

Found terminology that should be reviewed for inclusivity; see
https://www.rfc-editor.org/part2/#inclusive_language for background and more
guidance:

 * Term `master`; alternatives might be `active`, `central`, `initiator`,
   `leader`, `main`, `orchestrator`, `parent`, `primary`, `server`
 * Term `man`; alternatives might be `individual`, `people`, `person`

## Nits

All comments below are about very minor potential issues that you may choose to
address in some way - or ignore - as you see fit. Some were flagged by
automated tools (via https://github.com/larseggert/ietf-reviewtool), so there
will likely be some false positives. There is no need to let me know what you
did with these suggestions.

### URLs

These URLs in the document can probably be converted to HTTPS:

 * http://www.unicode.org/unicode/reports/tr36/

### Grammar/style

#### "Abstract", paragraph 1
```
 for OSPF and IS-IS respectively. However these specifications lack a method
                                  ^^^^^^^
```
A comma may be missing after the conjunctive/linking adverb "However".
(Also elsewhere.)

#### Section 1, paragraph 5
```
ry" instead of the "IGP registry" where as [RFC8623] and [RFC9168] uses the
                                  ^^^^^^^^
```
Did you mean "whereas"?

#### Section 3.2.2, paragraph 3
```
 string to be used to identify the key chain. It MUST be encoded using UTF-8.
                                   ^^^^^^^^^
```
This word is normally spelled as one. (Also elsewhere.)

#### Section 5, paragraph 4
```
 enable a man-in-the-middle attack. Thus before advertising the PCEP security
                                    ^^^^
```
A comma may be missing after the conjunctive/linking adverb "Thus".

## Notes

This review is in the ["IETF Comments" Markdown format][ICMF], You can use the
[`ietf-comments` tool][ICT] to automatically convert this review into
individual GitHub issues. Review generated by the [`ietf-reviewtool`][IRT].

[ICMF]: https://github.com/mnot/ietf-comments/blob/main/format.md
[ICT]: https://github.com/mnot/ietf-comments
[IRT]: https://github.com/larseggert/ietf-reviewtool



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