alienating aliens 
Boffins Say E.T. Too Bored By Our Messages To Phone Home 


Radio messages we've sent whizzing out into space over the years to try to 
contact aliens may simply be too boring for extra-terrestrial beings to answer, 
say a couple of Canadian astrophysicists. Tedious bits of math, physics and 
biology normally on offer may just be intellectual spam to alien minds. Find 
out what boffins Yvan Dutil and Stephane Dumas suggest we should send instead 
after the jump.

Previous messages beamed into deep space via radio-telescope by scientists have 
tried to demonstrate our intelligence by sending coded math problems, a bit of 
chemistry, physics and biology, some data on what we look like and even where 
we've come from. This may not, however, be good enough for their superior 
brains. Dutil and Dumas argue that if any alien does decode a message 
containing essentially trivial data, "after reading it, they will be none the 
wiser about us humans and our achievements." 

The really difficult bit is, of course, trying to work out what would be 
interesting to an extraterrestrial. Dumas and Dutil suggest that we should try 
things that will be new and different to an alien, like Britney's last album 
Paris Hilton's sex tape "social features of our society," or economics or 
sociology problems. These can still be described mathematically, which neatly 
gets around the problem of which language to use. 

Who knows, aliens may even be interested in our political issues, and so the 
starry-eyed Canadians have even begun trying to explain our electoral procedure 
in code: "We can explain our methods, and ask 'what do you use on your 
planet?'" You've got to hope that the answer is better than hanging chads.

As Dutil also points out, it might be handy to have a clever and interesting 
message to hand just in case an alien race ever tries to contact us "just to 
say 'we'll get back to you'"-followed presumably by "leave some math after the 
beep, and promise not to use your death-rays on us." - Kit Eaton
[New Scientist]

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