http://www.dailytimes.com.pk/default.asp?page=2009\12\02\story_2-12-2009_pg3_4

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

PURPLE PATCH: The normal man -Fyodor Dostoevsky



 With people who know how to revenge themselves and to stand up for themselves 
in general, how is it done? Why, when they are possessed, let us suppose, by 
the feeling of revenge, then for the time there is nothing else but that 
feeling left in their whole being. Such a gentleman simply dashes straight for 
his object like an infuriated bull with its horns down, and nothing but a wall 
will stop him. (By the way: facing the wall, such gentlemen - that is, the 
"direct" persons and men of action - are genuinely nonplussed. For them a wall 
is not an evasion, as for us people who think and consequently do nothing; it 
is not an excuse for turning aside, an excuse for which we are always very 
glad, though we scarcely believe in it ourselves, as a rule. No, they are 
nonplussed in all sincerity. The wall has for them something tranquillising, 
morally soothing, final - maybe even something mysterious ... but of the wall 
later.)

Well, such a direct person I regard as the real normal man, as his tender 
mother nature wished to see him when she graciously brought him into being on 
the earth. I envy such a man till I am green in the face. He is stupid. I am 
not disputing that, but perhaps the normal man should be stupid, how do you 
know? Perhaps it is very beautiful, in fact. And I am the more persuaded of 
that suspicion, if one can call it so, by the fact that if you take, for 
instance, the antithesis of the normal man, that is, the man of acute 
consciousness, who has come, of course, not out of the lap of nature but out of 
a retort (this is almost mysticism, gentlemen, but I suspect this, too), this 
retort-made man is sometimes so nonplussed in the presence of his antithesis 
that with all his exaggerated consciousness he genuinely thinks of himself as a 
mouse and not a man. It may be an acutely conscious mouse, yet it is a mouse, 
while the other is a man, and therefore, et cetera, et cetera. And the worst of 
it is, he himself, his very own self, looks on himself as a mouse; no one asks 
him to do so; and that is an important point. Now let us look at this mouse in 
action. Let us suppose, for instance, that it feels insulted, too (and it 
almost always does feel insulted), and wants to revenge itself, too. There may 
even be a greater accumulation of spite in it than in l'homme de la nature et 
de la verite. The base and nasty desire to vent that spite on its assailant 
rankles perhaps even more nastily in it than in l'homme de la nature et de la 
verite. For through his innate stupidity the latter looks upon his revenge as 
justice pure and simple; while in consequence of his acute consciousness the 
mouse does not believe in the justice of it. To come at last to the deed 
itself, to the very act of revenge. Apart from the one fundamental nastiness 
the luckless mouse succeeds in creating around it so many other nastinesses in 
the form of doubts and questions, adds to the one question so many unsettled 
questions that there inevitably works up around it a sort of fatal brew, a 
stinking mess, made up of its doubts, emotions, and of the contempt spat upon 
it by the direct men of action who stand solemnly about it as judges and 
arbitrators, laughing at it till their healthy sides ache. Of course the only 
thing left for it is to dismiss all that with a wave of its paw, and, with a 
smile of assumed contempt in which it does not even itself believe, creep 
ignominiously into its mouse-hole. There in its nasty, stinking, underground 
home our insulted, crushed and ridiculed mouse promptly becomes absorbed in 
cold, malignant and, above all, everlasting spite. For forty years together it 
will remember its injury down to the smallest, most ignominious details, and 
every time will add, of itself, details still more ignominious, spitefully 
teasing and tormenting itself with its own imagination. It will itself be 
ashamed of its imaginings, but yet it will recall it all, it will go over and 
over every detail, it will invent unheard of things against itself, pretending 
that those things might happen, and will forgive nothing. Maybe it will begin 
to revenge itself, too, but, as it were, piecemeal, in trivial ways, from 
behind the stove, incognito, without believing either in its own right to 
vengeance, or in the success of its revenge, knowing that from all its efforts 
at revenge it will suffer a hundred times more than he on whom it revenges 
itself, while he, I daresay, will not even scratch himself. On its deathbed it 
will recall it all over again, with interest accumulated over all the years.

But it is just in that cold, abominable half despair, half belief, in that 
conscious burying oneself alive for grief in the underworld for forty years, in 
that acutely recognised and yet partly doubtful hopelessness of one's position, 
in that hell of unsatisfied desires turned inward, in that fever of 
oscillations, of resolutions determined for ever and repented of again a minute 
later - that the savour of that strange enjoyment of which I have spoken lies. 
It is so subtle, so difficult of analysis, that persons who are a little 
limited, or even simply persons of strong nerves, will not understand a single 
atom of it. 

(This extract is taken from Notes from the Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky)

Fyodor Dostoevsky was a Russian writer, essayist and philosopher. Dostoyevsky's 
literary output explores human psychology in the troubled political, social and 
spiritual context of 19th century Russian society


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