http://www.theage.com.au/world/girls-act-as-boys-to-help-families-avoid-shame-20100921-15lar.html
Girls act as boys to help families avoid shame Jenny Nordberg September 22, 2010 Mehran Rafaat (left) with her twin sisters Benafsha and Beheshta outside their family home in Kabul. Mehran, 6, is regarded as a boy by her family. Photo: New York Times SIX-YEAR-OLD Mehran Rafaat is like many girls her age. She loves to be the centre of attention. Like her three older sisters, she is eager to discover the world outside the family's apartment in their middle-class neighbourhood of Kabul. But when their mother, Azita Rafaat, a member of parliament, dresses the children for school in the morning, there is a difference. Mehran's sisters put on black dresses and head scarves, tied tightly over their ponytails. For Mehran, it's green pants, a white shirt and a tie, then a pat from her mother over her spiky, short black hair. After that, her daughter is out the door - as an Afghan boy. There are no statistics about how many Afghan girls masquerade as boys. But when asked, Afghans of several generations can often tell a story of a female relative, friend, neighbour or co-worker who grew up disguised as a boy. To those who know, these children are often referred to as neither ''daughter'' nor ''son'' in conversation, but as ''bacha posh'', which literally means ''dressed up as a boy'' in Dari. Afghan families have many reasons for pretending their girls are boys, including economic need, social pressure to have sons and, in some cases, a superstition that doing so can lead to the birth of a real boy. Lacking a son, the parents decide to make one up, usually by cutting the hair of a daughter and dressing her in typical Afghan men's clothing. There are no specific legal or religious proscriptions against the practice. In most cases, a return to womanhood takes place when the child enters puberty. In a land where sons are more highly valued, since only they can inherit the father's wealth and pass down a name, families without boys are the objects of pity and contempt. Even a made-up son increases the family's standing, at least for a few years. A bacha posh can also more easily receive an education, work outside the home, even escort her sisters in public, allowing freedoms that are unheard of for girls. But for some, the change can be disorienting as well as liberating, stranding the women in a limbo between the sexes. ''I know it's very hard for you to believe why one mother is doing these things to their youngest daughter,'' Mrs Rafaat said in imperfect English. ''But I want to say for you, that some things are happening in Afghanistan that are really not imaginable for you as a Western people.'' Today, the family's relatives and colleagues all know Mehran's real gender, but the appearance of a son before guests and acquaintances is just enough to keep the family functioning, Mrs Rafaat said. At least for now. Mehran's father said he felt closer to her than to his other children and even thought of her as a son. NEW YORK TIMES [Non-text portions of this message have been removed] ------------------------------------ Post message: [email protected] Subscribe : [email protected] Unsubscribe : [email protected] List owner : [email protected] Homepage : http://proletar.8m.com/Yahoo! Groups Links <*> To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/proletar/ <*> Your email settings: Individual Email | Traditional <*> To change settings online go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/proletar/join (Yahoo! ID required) <*> To change settings via email: [email protected] [email protected] <*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [email protected] <*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to: http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
