http://highscalability.com/ has a number of case studies as does
http://www.allthingsdistributed.com/ and are pretty good references.

As for a consolidated FAQ, there are so many variables, there is never
a best for every solution. In every case, you have to know what your
stumbling blocks are in order to fix them. And you can't just look at
the benchmark of the day because many are not run properly or aren't
anywhere near testing real world situations.

For one project I'm working on, I thought my use case was rather
specific. After evaluating nine potential solutions and implementing
two test projects in two separate long polling/ajax push scenarios, I
realized that my initial design wouldn't work and that none of the
solutions were optimal for what I needed. So, I had to pull the
decision making back a layer and then I could implement almost any
long polling solution - each worked as long as I had the ability to
access named pipes.

The battles with noSQL versus SQL are almost as religious as which
noSQL solution is best. Do you need streaming map/reduce? do you care
about immediate or eventual consistency?

Every decision brings a dozen solutions and each solution needs to be
evaluated. There are people that will pick their favorites and become
experts in those and in 90% of the cases, you can usually shoehorn an
idea into the tools in your skillset. The fundamental differences
between riak, mongodb, couchdb, cassandra, etc. are there, but, it
would be hard to say that any of them couldn't be engineered to handle
most of the nosql use cases.

While it would be nice to say, a + b + c + d = fastest, you need to
qualify that as 'fastest in this situation'.

Welcome to the world of scaling. :)

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