Like someone else just said... it seems like more and more of us are falling into this category of family taking a hike or wanting to be absolved from many responsibilities or obligations to their own flesh and blood! Until this past early summer... I thought my family would be there for me but I found out differently and it is a sad state of affairs.
I would love to have the backing or help to start a bedroom community of sorts that consisted of houses and apartments for people with spinal cord injuries. In that way... several home health agencies would make a lot of money by having their aides go to this location and people either paying them privately or with insurance. I wish I had the money to invest in such a venture but I don't. Can we start a new subject called "Family Members Helping" so we know what the topic is right away? Well, I kinda just did! Lori Michaelson C4/5 complete quad, 28 years post Tucson, AZ On 10/16/07, Stacy Harim <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > That's how I am feeling now. I'm still stuck in bed. I was up a few > weeks in rehab since May. I've got my mother here complaining about her > problems constantly but doesn't seem to have compassion for me and complains > about how much I eat. I eat twice a day and it's usually toast or a muffin > in the morning. She does have problems and has no problem making me feel > guilty but I also offered to go to a nursing home until I could get on my > "feet" and she said she could do it. Today she said she wants to just quit > but says she cant do "this" all of the time. She has me crying often by > making me feel bad. Accusing me of not trying. I do free weights in bed as > much as I can or handle but that isn't enough for her I guess. > > I often wish I didn't survive in the first place. I want to just blurt > out that I should just have the brain damage they thought I was going to > have then I'd be put away and she can just forget me. It hurts because my > one brother is in prison and my older brother pretty much has nothng to do > with any of us but they can do no wrong. My brother in prison got moved to > the other side of the state and my mom tells me she feels like she is losing > all of us right in front of me. I said something about having kids b'c I > dont think I want to risk pregnancy with my spine the way it is and she said > look where kids got me "one's in prison, one's dead, one doesn't call, > and you are in the hospital." I know she cares. If she didn't, she > wouldn't be here but she can say the most hurtful things. I'm at a loss of > what to do. If I told her she can't help me anymore then should would lose > money bc of the waiver but then I could get someone that could do the job > and get me out of bed. If I did that then she would have to completely move > back in and I can't handle that at all. When she was living here we fought > constantly and I can only bite my tounge for so long. > > Stacy > > > ----- Original Message ---- > From: Danny Espinoza <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > To: Stacy Harim <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; > [email protected] > Sent: Monday, October 15, 2007 11:35:00 AM > Subject: RE: [QUAD-L] Brother wants me in a home > > I hope my family wont do that to me…… I feel like such a burden on them…. > Sometimes I wish I let them pull the plug…… > > > > > > Danny Espinoza 24/m/California > > > > Occupation before accident - Network engineer / SR. Network security > engineer > > Broke c2,c6,c7 and doner bone at c2 > > TBI from blood going to central cortex from spinal cord > > off a vent "woohoo" however only one diaphragm works right now "due to > > asymmetric SCI" > > http://www.myspace.com/DannyLNX > > > > *From:* Stacy Harim [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > *Sent:* Monday, October 15, 2007 6:23 AM > *To:* [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [email protected] > *Subject:* Re: [QUAD-L] Brother wants me in a home > > > > I know what you mean about availability of caregivers. It's horrible > here. I got my extra hours approved but I can't find anyone willing to > drive 30 miles for the 2 hours in the morning and at night. I'm so > frustrated that I've been in bed so long unecessarily. I had the pleasure > of being up for inpatient rehab for almost 2 weeks since May. Another > summer gone. > > > > I'm sorry about your brother. Even family can be very selfish. My older > brother didn't even call when he found out that I broke my back and spent > time in the hospital. He talked to my mom once and that is when he found > out. You'd think after almost losing us, they would be a little more > grateful that we are alive. > > > > Stacy > > ----- Original Message ---- > From: "[EMAIL PROTECTED]" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > To: [email protected] > Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 7:44:42 PM > Subject: [QUAD-L] Brother wants me in a home > > > It's the second time he (older brother) has brought this up in less then > 4 months. (I'd hate to see what he'll do if his wife or children were like > this.) > > > > With that said, my folks and myself included no longer want him here. He > is just so fixed on what others in my family are doing to help. Like God for > bid he does anymore then someone else in the family...and that to boot was > rare. > > > > Not to mention my twin just got his schedule changed at his job due to the > advancement in his position. It put him from night shift to morning shift. > > > > So, now I face a big dilemma in my life because my folks are older and > cannot do everything for me. i.e.; getting me in and out of bed. > > > > But I've looked around for grants or financial assistants to help me pay > for a one rail ceiling lift so it would be less stressful on whomever had to > transfer me. > > > > Any suggestion would help please... > > > > Keith/34/C4-5/NJ > > > > PS. It's crazy to think that I'd be fighting my family to stay in the > community, but that's my luck. Plus, the PCA availability stinks in my area > not to mention I just get max 21 hours. > > > > ------------------------------ > > See what's new at AOL.com <http://www.aol.com/?NCID=AOLCMP00300000001170>and > Make > AOL Your Homepage<http://www.aol.com/mksplash.adp?NCID=AOLCMP00300000001169> > . > > > > > ------------------------------ > > Building a website is a piece of cake. > Yahoo! Small Business gives you all the tools to get > online.<http://us.rd.yahoo.com/evt=48251/*http:/smallbusiness.yahoo.com/webhosting/?p=PASSPORTPLUS> > > > > __________________________________________________ > Do You Yahoo!? > Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around > http://mail.yahoo.com > -- Lori C4/5 complete quad, 27 years post Tucson, AZ
