Hey all. I am having problems and serious concerns. My mom recently got two
of her toes amputated due to bad circulation She isn't walking well on top of
that due to the circulation. I am the only kid that is tepping up to the plate
with her. My younger brother is in prison so has no way to help and my older
brother isn't even calling us after several attempst to call him.
Every morning I get a call from her all upset about something. I am working on
getting her medical assistance and hoping I can get help with her rent since
she doesn't have an income and hopefully she will be able to draw disability.
On top of the toes she has an ulcer on the inside of her leg. I talked to the
doctor telling him that I cant physically help her and now he is getting her to
rehab. She is freaking out bc it is a nursing home/rehab.
I am at a loss of what to do. She has car payments, phone, electric, etc. We
have talked about letting the car go but she lives out in the middle of nowhere
and she can't stop onto my van. I'm doing everything I can tp keep her from
living with me again. I can't take her negativity and if you all remember, she
chased away a guy that I was dating. On top of it all I will need to get
spinal curgery again soon and scared to death of what will happen to my mom in
the coming years when she wont be able to care for herself at all.
I did get my name back on the list for substuting with the board of edication a
few weeks ago so I can help pay her bills but havent been called at all. I need
to help my mom, but finding it so hard.
I'm curious to know how you all have handled or handling the aging of parents
when you can't physically take care of them.. I always knew I would be the one
to care for my parents when they got older but now that I have problems, I know
I wont be able to do it and it breaks my heart to think my mom will eventually
end up on a home since my brother wont even call to see how she is doing.
It is so exhausting dealing with my mom now. She is a terrible patientand is
getting great care but she doesn't think so. Like i said before, she calls me
first thing in the morning every day crying about something and doesnt seem to
calm down unless I am there. the day she has surgery, she had her heart rate
well over a hundred and refuses anxiety medicine. She didnt calm down until
her friend that was visiting and I went to see her. Her friend was on her way
home so I was at the hospital all day into the night to keep her calm.
When I was in the hospital she constantly complained to me about things going
on at home and now is throwing things in my face but she didnt do as much as
she thinks because I had my dad helping me with my bills. I was three hours
away in baltimore and she wasnt able to come see me but expects me to be with
her all the time. I've missed a couple of days seeing her to give my back a
break which hurts all of the time bc of the screw moving that popped through
the vertabrae that I have to get fixed.
I have my second opinion in april for my back and will try to put off the
surgery as long as I can so I can try to help her but cant put it off forever.
I knoq I rambled but I'm really upset over this situation and scared to death
of what is going to hapen. does anyone have any suggestions on how I can get
funds to save her car and apt.? Like I said, moving back in with isn't
something I can handle. Mostlh because of her negativity complaining all of
the time about everything and how she picks at me. Her own friend cant deal
with it.
Any suggestions would be great and even a prayer wouldn't hurt.
Stacy
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