And at North Mesquite Assembly of God in the bulletin regarding a Sunday evnening gathering:
Boys will bring the drinks and the girls will be the snacks. What a riot! >From: G�nter Pflaum <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> >To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> >Subject: [RR] WG: for a good laugh... >Date: Fri, 15 Mar 2002 22:02:17 +0100 > > >-----Urspr�ngliche Nachricht----- >Von: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] >Gesendet: Freitag, 15. M�rz 2002 16:01 >An: undisclosed-recipients:; >Betreff: for a good laugh... > > >These are actual clippings from church newspapers. >It's amazing what a little proof-reading would prevent: > >Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking tonight >at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine. Come tonight and hear >Bertha Belch all the way from Africa. > >Announcement in the church bulletin for a National PRAYER & >FASTING Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting and >Prayer conference includes meals." > >Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in >the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King. > >Miss Charlene Mason sang, "I will not pass this way again," >giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. > >"Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid >of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget >your husbands." > >Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers'. >Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome! Everyone >come for a fun time. > >The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due >to a conflict. > >The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon >tonight: "Searching for Jesus." > >Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all >the help they can get. > >Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more >transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests >tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons. > >The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir >will sing "Break Forth into Joy." > >Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. > >Smile at someone who is hard to love. > >Say "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you. > >Don't let worry kill you - let the Church help. > >Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the >church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. > >At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is >Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice. > >Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition >of several new members and to the deterioration of some older >ones. > >The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoy >sinning to join the choir. > >Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be >recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. > >The Lutheran men's group will meet at 6 PM. Steak, mashed >potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a >nominal feel. For those of you who have children and don't know >it, we have a nursery downstairs. > >Please place your donation in the envelope along with the >deceased person(s) you want remembered. > >Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy >lunch. > >The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb >entertainment, and gracious hostility. > >Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 P.M.-prayer and medication to >follow. > >The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. >They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. This >evening at 7 P.M. there will be a hymn sing in the park across >from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. > >Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All >ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. >is done. > >The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation >would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast >next Sunday morning. > >Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday. Please use the >back door. > >The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the >Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The Congregation is invited to >attend this tragedy. > >Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian >Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. > >Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes. > >The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign >slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours." > _________________________________________________________________ Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com _______ Let the Golden Rule be your daily rule. Please pray for your list sponsor: http://eBible.org/mpj/ To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe rangernet" to [EMAIL PROTECTED] or visit http://rangernet.org/subscribe.htm http://rangernet.org
