Hey Kelly, That is one for the Bulletin Bloopers file.
Ironed Mike ----- Original Message ----- From: "Kelly Gist" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Sent: Friday, March 15, 2002 4:33 PM Subject: Re: [RR] WG: for a good laugh... > > And at North Mesquite Assembly of God in the bulletin regarding a Sunday > evnening gathering: > > Boys will bring the drinks and the girls will be the snacks. > > What a riot! > > >From: G�nter Pflaum <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > >To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > >Subject: [RR] WG: for a good laugh... > >Date: Fri, 15 Mar 2002 22:02:17 +0100 > > > > > >-----Urspr�ngliche Nachricht----- > >Von: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >Gesendet: Freitag, 15. M�rz 2002 16:01 > >An: undisclosed-recipients:; > >Betreff: for a good laugh... > > > > > >These are actual clippings from church newspapers. > >It's amazing what a little proof-reading would prevent: > > > >Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking tonight > >at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine. Come tonight and hear > >Bertha Belch all the way from Africa. > > > >Announcement in the church bulletin for a National PRAYER & > >FASTING Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting and > >Prayer conference includes meals." > > > >Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in > >the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King. > > > >Miss Charlene Mason sang, "I will not pass this way again," > >giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. > > > >"Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid > >of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget > >your husbands." > > > >Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers'. > >Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome! Everyone > >come for a fun time. > > > >The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due > >to a conflict. > > > >The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon > >tonight: "Searching for Jesus." > > > >Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all > >the help they can get. > > > >Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more > >transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests > >tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons. > > > >The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir > >will sing "Break Forth into Joy." > > > >Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. > > > >Smile at someone who is hard to love. > > > >Say "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you. > > > >Don't let worry kill you - let the Church help. > > > >Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the > >church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. > > > >At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is > >Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice. > > > >Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition > >of several new members and to the deterioration of some older > >ones. > > > >The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoy > >sinning to join the choir. > > > >Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be > >recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. > > > >The Lutheran men's group will meet at 6 PM. Steak, mashed > >potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a > >nominal feel. For those of you who have children and don't know > >it, we have a nursery downstairs. > > > >Please place your donation in the envelope along with the > >deceased person(s) you want remembered. > > > >Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy > >lunch. > > > >The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb > >entertainment, and gracious hostility. > > > >Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 P.M.-prayer and medication to > >follow. > > > >The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. > >They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. This > >evening at 7 P.M. there will be a hymn sing in the park across > >from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. > > > >Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All > >ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. > >is done. > > > >The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation > >would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast > >next Sunday morning. > > > >Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday. Please use the > >back door. > > > >The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the > >Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The Congregation is invited to > >attend this tragedy. > > > >Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian > >Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. > > > >Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes. > > > >The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign > >slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours." > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com > > _______ > Let the Golden Rule be your daily rule. > > Please pray for your list sponsor: http://eBible.org/mpj/ > > To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe rangernet" to [EMAIL PROTECTED] > or visit http://rangernet.org/subscribe.htm > http://rangernet.org > > _______ Let the Golden Rule be your daily rule. Please pray for your list sponsor: http://eBible.org/mpj/ To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe rangernet" to [EMAIL PROTECTED] or visit http://rangernet.org/subscribe.htm http://rangernet.org
