I did something really unusual today --- I took a day off work in the middle
of the week for a "non-Ranger"(almost) reason. It has been great - I slept
till 9:00 this morning. Then I sat back in my recliner and ate breakfast.
Now I am up to the point of cleaning out old ranger files on my computer.
Found this humorous piece in my files and thought I would share it.
********************
Euro-English!!!!!
The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the
other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government
conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has
accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish":
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of
the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less
letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like
"fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always
ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes
of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.
By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be
dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to
ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor
trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!
And zen ve vil take over ze vorld!!!
BWAH HA HA HA HA
In His Service,
Allen R. Cook - Cookie
Royal Rangers Senior Commander
Belton A/G -- Belton, Missouri
e-mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
web page: http:\\www.sound.net\~pabonim\index.htm
website submissions: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
new website: http://www.crosswinds.net/~rrcookie/
________________________________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com
_______
To unsubscribe, send "unsubscribe rangernet" to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
"Eat the hay & spit out the sticks! - A#1's mule" RTKB&G4JC!
http://rangernet.org Autoresponder: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
