My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He
asked 
me how old I was, and I told him, "62." He was quiet for a moment, and
then 
he asked, "Did you start at 1?"



*********************************************************************
After 
putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks
and 
a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children

getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she 
threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them
back 
to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the 
three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

****************************************************************** A 
grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood
was 
like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a
tire; 
it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild 
raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in.
At 
last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

********************************************************************** My

grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how
you 
and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how
are 
we alike?" "You're both old," he replied.

********************************************************************** A 
little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word 
processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he 
asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."

************************************************************************
I 
didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided
to 
test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She
would 
tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
continued. 
At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you
should 
try to figure out some of these yourself!"

************************************************************************ 
When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the
lights 
off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a
few 
fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered,
"It's 
no use, Grandpa. The mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."

************************************************************************ 
When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not 
sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four
to 
six."

********************************************************************** A 
second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother,
"Grandma, 
guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more
than 
a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she
said, 
"How do you make babies?" IIt's simple," replied the girl. "You just
change 
'y' to 'i' and add 'es'"

************************************************************************ 
Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a 
teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder
pregnant." 
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what
pregnant 
means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means 
carrying a child."

************************************************************************
A 
nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home
one 
day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire 
truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's
duties. 
They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No, said another,

"he's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close.

"They use the dogs", she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

Delma

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