DOG'S NOTE TO SELF
DOG'S NOTE TO SELF: These are just some of the things I must remember (in order to keep my present living arrangements): The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge, behind the sofa or under the bed. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house. I will not eat the cats' food, before they eat it or after they throw it up. I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet > in the house when I am about to get sick. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell. I will not eat any more Kleenex or napkins and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. I will not chew my humans' toothbrushes and not tell them. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on television. The sofa is not a face towel; neither are Mom and Dad's laps. My head does not belong in the refrigerator. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box; although they are tasty, they are not food. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration. I will not roll around in the dirt right after just getting a bath. The toilet bowl is not a never ending water supply and, just because the water is blue, doesn't mean it's cleaner. The cat is not a squeaky toy so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing. --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Access the Recipes And More list archives at: http://www.mail-archive.com/recipesandmore%40googlegroups.com/ Visit the group home page at: http://groups.google.com/group/RecipesAndMore -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
