PLEASE FORWARD/POST AS APPROPRIATE
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mini-Annals of Improbable Research ("mini-AIR")
Issue Number 2002-02
February, 2001
ISSN 1076-500X
Key words: improbable research, science humor, Ig Nobel, AIR, the
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A free newsletter of tidbits too tiny to fit in the
Annals of Improbable Research (AIR),
the journal of inflated research and personalities
================================================================
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2002-02-01 TABLE OF CONTENTS
2002-02-01 Table of Contents
2002-02-02 mini Housekeeping
2002-02-03 What's New in the Magazine
2002-02-04 LFH Survey
2002-02-05 AIR Dining Principle
2002-02-06 Air Dining Principle
2002-02-07 Breatharian Potluck
2002-02-08 Food-Based Nutrition
2002-02-09 Ferruginousness
2002-02-10 Expert Challenge
2002-02-11 Accomplishments in Cheating
2002-02-12 Cogno-Intellectual Co-Intelligence
2002-02-13 Eyewitness Multiplicity
2002-02-14 Crystal Opinion
2002-02-15 Textbook Opinions
2002-02-16 HISTORIC MINUTE
2002-02-17 Cavalcade of HotAIR: Egg, Usher, Etcetera
2002-02-18 Project AIRhead 2000: Psycho, Info
2002-02-19 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Blot, Quad, Date, Burp
2002-02-20 AIRhead Events
2002-02-21 How to Subscribe to AIR (*)
2002-02-22 Our Address (*)
2002-02-23 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*)
2002-02-24 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*)
Items marked (*) are reprinted in every issue.
mini-AIR is
a free monthly *e-supplement* to AIR, the print magazine
----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-02 mini Housekeeping
AIR events this month:
1. BACKLESS GOWN -- "Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Dress"
will be performed in Springfield, MA. .............. Feb 10
2. BAY AREA. There will be AIR shows in California this month:
at Stanford .................... Feb 14
AAAS meeting in San Francisco ......... Feb 16
at UC Berkeley ................................ Feb 20
For details, see section 2002-02-20 below.
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2002-02-03 What's New in the Magazine
AIR 7:1 (Jan/Feb 2001) is the special IG NOBEL PRIZE issue, chock
full of fulsome coverage of the recent Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony.
As is traditional with the annual Ig issue, this one is late
getting out. The printer is mailing subscribers' copies this week.
We've put a sampling of the articles onto the AIR web site:
<> "The Groundhog Oscillation: Evidence of Global
Change," by Andrew J. Gerrard, Christina M. Gerrard,
Mark A. London, Keith A. Soldavin, Timothy J. Kane,
and Alan Freed
<> "Who Will Win the 2004 U.S. Presidential Election?," an
analysis by Eric Schulman.
<> Special tributes to Victor Borge by Leonid Hambro (who
collaborated with Borge for ten years) and Richard Lederer
<> "To Make Love as a Testee," -- the first person-account
by Ida Sabelis, 2000 Ig Nobel Prize co-winner, who was
the first women to make love inside an MRI machine
Many further delights are in the print magazine.
See the cover and full table of contents, and several of the
articles at
<http://www.improbable.com/airchives/paperair/volume7/v7i1/v7i1-
toc.html>
(What you are reading at this moment is mini-AIR,
a monthly e-mail small supplement to the print magazine.)
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2002-02-04 LFH Survey
We are compiling a list of scientists who have luxuriant, flowing
hair (LFH). The initial list, assembled by a subcommittee
comprised of seven members of the American Association for the
Advancement of Science, is meant as a nucleating seed, from which
the larger list will grow. Here is the initial list:
Steven Pinker <http://www.mit.edu/~pinker/>
If you know of a scientist who has luxuriant, flowing hair, and
who therefore should be included on the list, please send info to
LUXURIANT HAIR SCIENCE c/o <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>. Please
include a URL that points to an evidentiary photograph or drawing
in which the luxuriant, flowing hair (LFH) is clearly evident.
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2002-02-05 AIR Dining Principle
It has been brought to our attention that some of our readers eat
food. For them we offer a set of AIR Dining Principles, which are
drawn from our own experience. Here is the first:
==> AIR Dining Principle #1
------------------------
LEMMA: If you go to a restaurant that's called
"So-and-so's X House," or "House of X," or "X Grill,"
you should order the X.
EXAMPLE: If you go to a restaurant called "Frank's
Steak House," order the steak.
EXPLANATION: Go to a restaurant called "Frank's
Steak House" and order the veal scalopini. You will
immediately see why you should have ordered the steak.
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2002-02-06 Air Dining Principle
It has been brought to our attention that some of our readers do
not eat food. For them we recommend the research conducted by the
Breatharians. Breatharians subsist joyfully on light and air.
See <http://www.breatharian.com/> for basic details.
For more advanced topics in Breatharian research, see the work of
2000 Ig Nobel Literature Prize-winner Jasmuheen -- especially her
prize-winning book "Living on Light." For further detail, follow
the links at <http://www.improbable.com/ig/ig-
pastwinners.html#ig2000>
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2002-02-07 Breatharian Potluck
There will be a Breatharian Potluck dinner Thursday night at Judy
and Ralph's house.
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2002-02-08 Food-Based Nutrition
For a non-Breatharian snack, meal, or diet, we recommend Food-
Based Nutrition. For info about this fact-growing research topic,
see <http://www.improbable.com/news/2001/jan/food-based.html>
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2002-02-09 Ferruginousness
Investigator Ralph Watson wrote, again, to tell us that he
resembles a ferruginous pygmy-owl. Again we requested a
photograph. Again investigator Watson declined to send one.
It was investigator Watson who touched off the heated debate here
as to the exact manner in which the ferruginous pygmy-owl
terminates its call.
While not entirely dismissing Stiles and Skutch's 1989 suggestion
that the ferruginous pygmy-owl sometimes finishes its call with a
"sharp bark or whinny," investigator Watson has long advocated the
view that the call of the ferruginous pygmy-owl more commonly ends
with a series of "high, yelping twitters." He offers as proof a
recording of the call of what he "guarantees" to be a ferruginous
Pygmy-owl. This recording can be found at:
<http://biology.queensu.ca/~mennilld/FEPYsong.wav>
As with all investigator Watson' previous communications, this one
terminated with the claim: "Pygmy-owl calls elicit a strong
mobbing response from many passerines, including many warblers and
vireos. Imitation of this vocalization often attracts more small
passerines than pishing does."
As yet, we have taken no public position on the matter.
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2002-02-10 Expert Challenge
This month's Expert Challenge Survey (#6) asks:
In a tag-team battle to the death, which would win:
(a) a team of Professional Experts; or
(b) a team of Amateur Experts?
Please register your expert or amateur opinion at
EXPERT CHALLENGE c/o <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
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2002-02-11 Accomplishments in Cheating
The British Medical Journal has editorialized (vol. 322, no. 7281,
February 3, 2001) that "Students need to be taught about what
constitutes academic misconduct." [See
http://bmj.com/cgi/content/full/322/7281/0/e] for details.]
In our experience, students learn a concept best when they see the
highest, best real-life examples of that concept. If you are, or
were an especially accomplished academic cheat, we invite you to
send us (preferably in 25 words or less) an account of your own
greatest triumph.
Please send your true tale to "I AM AN ACCOMPLISHED ACADEMIC
FELON" c/o <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
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2002-02-12 Cogno-Intellectual Co-Intelligence
Many of you taken part in Project Cogno-Intellectual, our modest
effort to insinuate a new, prestigious, utterly meaningless word
into the mouthings of officials.
Not surprisingly, some of these officials have appropriated and
mangled the charming phrase. Still, the meaning endures.
Investigator Phyllis Tang brings to our attention the work of the
Co-Intelligence Institute, which is based in Eugene, Oregon.
We recommend a relaxed, lengthy visit to their web site,
<http://www.co-intelligence.org/>. Perhaps the delight of delights
is a list of " Ideas, theories, models," which include the
following:
5 Dimensions of Co-Intelligence
5 Fields of Co-Intelligence
10 Qualities of Co-Intelligence
6 Parts of Wholeness
Four Dynamics of Wholeness
Co-Intelligence Factors Checklists
Leadership and Co-Intelligence
The Power of Story: The Story Paradigm
More Definitions of Co-Intelligence
And so, inspired by the work of the Co-Intelligence Institute, we
recommend use of the term "co-intelligence." It is at least fully
the equal of "cogno-intellectual." Such lovely words! Long may
they wave on bureaucra-tongues everywhere.
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2002-02-13 Eyewitness Multiplicity
Here is another citation from our collection of articles by
authors with the same last name. (Thanks to M. Rose Barlow for
bringing this to our attention.) This one features a curious
quasi-resonance of identity issues both in the title and the list
of co-authors.
"Accuracy of Eyewitness Identification in Showups and Lineups," by
A. Daniel Yarmey, Meagan J. Yarmey, and A. Linda Yarmey, Law and
Human Behavior, vol. 20, no. 4, 1996, pp. 459-77.
----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-14 Crystal Opinion
Should singer Linda Ronstadt be labeled as a silicon crystal? The
answer is in. The results of last month's Scientific Correctness
Survey (#605) are:
32% YES, singer Linda Ronstadt should
be labeled as a silicon crystal
37% NO, singer Linda Ronstadt should not
be labeled as a silicon crystal
29% UNDECIDED and/or UNSURE and/or BAFFLED
This was inspired by a January 14, 2001 Associated Press news
account about science textbooks:
Researchers compiled 500 pages of errors,
ranging from maps depicting the equator passing through
the southern United States to a photo of singer
Linda Ronstadt labeled as a silicon crystal.
Our survey respondents were not short of opinions. Here are four:
"Linda Ronstadt should be labeled as a silicon crystal."
--Valerie H. Blassey
"What I want to know is, WHY a photo of Linda Ronstadt in a
science textbook at all? What was the caption supposed to read?
'The Big Bang'?????"
-- Thomas D Hubbard
Wouldn't you check her refractive index before posing a question
like that? (P.S. Do silicon crystals have refractive indices?)
-- Naomi Stephen
"Unfortunately, you are asking the wrong question. Of course
singer Linda Ronstadt should not be labeled as a crystal. However,
this isn't what the textbook did -- it labeled a *photo* of singer
Linda Ronstadt. The mistake was in the type of crystal. A photo of
singer Linda Ronstadt should be labeled as silver halide
crystals."
--Lee Doron
----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-15 Textbook Opinions
The aforementioned researchers inspired us to ask a second
question. Here are the results of that:
17% YES, textbooks should be used in science classes
62% NO, textbooks should not be used in science classes
19% OTHER
And here is a sampling of commentary:
"Yes - but not as reading material. I'm sure a good science
teacher could come up with many other uses for the books."
--Bob Wiegand
"No -- My astronomy professor, Jan Dabrowski, should be used
instead of textbooks in all science classes. This is not just my
opinion. Everyone who has taken his class agrees."
--Monica Eisenschmidt
Human Studies Major, Marylhurst University
"It occurs to me that Linda Ronstadt might be used in science
classrooms nationwide instead of textbooks. She can't be much
worse than the current texts."
-- SSgt. Brian Niemi
"Yes, of course. Texts provide a reference, a framework around
which to develop a course, and, at their best are a source of new
ideas and experiments to be done. Should a science class be
entirely text-based? No -- in science, as in all subject, students
need to actually _do_ what it is the course is about. No one would
expect a student to take an English class without ever writing a
paper (I hope). Similarly, science students need to do science,
which cannot be done by reading a text."
--Lillian Van Rompay
High School Math Teacher, Ann Arbor, MI
NOTE: The report that inspired all this is available on the web at
<http://www.psrc-online.org/curriculum/book.html>. (Thanks to
investigator Adrian Smith for tracking it down.)
----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-16 HISTORIC MINUTE
If you are going to the AAAS annual meeting in San Francisco, be
sure to come to the Annals of Improbable Research session Friday
evening, Feb 16.
And if you're an early riser, come to the special AIR presentation
of Eric Schulman's "The History of the Universe in One Hundred
Words or Less." It will open the Plenary Session on Monday
Morning, Feb 18.
For schedules see Section 2002-02-20 below.
----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-17 Cavalcade of HotAIR: Egg, Usher, Etcetera
Here are concise, incomplete, flighty mentions of some of the
features we've posted on HotAIR since last month's mini-AIR came
out. You can get to all of them by clicking on "WHAT'S NEW" at the
web site, or by going to:
<http://www.improbable.com/navstrip/whatsnew.html>
CHEMISTRY LESSON -- TODAY'S WATER: In which we explore the
question, "How large is an 8 oz. glass?"
WASHINGTON HEIGHT REQUIREMENT: An exclusive AIR news scoop. The
new President of the US has imposed a minimum height requirement
on ushers.
MEMORABLE RECALL -- UNDECLARED EGG IN EGGROLLS
NON DRINKING & SERENE HABITS: A letter we received from a
stranger, " a young man of 38 years, completely normal, and a
healthy person, with non drinking & serene habits."
MEMORABLE RECALL -- GARLIC-FLAVORED PIG EARS
MAY WE RECOMMEND -- HEALTHY HOLY WATER
THESE, AND MORE, ARE ON HOTAIR AT
<http://www.improbable.com/navstrip/whatsnew.html>
----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-18 Project AIRhead 2000: Psycho, Info
A further selection from our immense collection of items that
inexplicably include "2000" in their names:
ITEM #83717 (submitted by investigator Mel Siegel)
PSYCHO-CYBERNETICS 2000, book from Prentice Hall promising
information on how to obtain unsurpassed happiness, infinite
riches, love, glowing health, a satisfying career and more.
ITEM #33827 (submitted by investigator B.R. Richardson)
INFOSTATION 2000, Chase Manhattan Bank NA Global Securities
Services (GSS) group - software tools created so that "securities
managers can quickly and easily develop strategies to manage their
securities."
-----------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-19 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Blot, Quad, Date, Burp
Here is a further selection of items that merit a trip to the
library.
BLOTTO
"Blotting at 25," Ed M. Southern, Trends in Biochemical Sciences,
vol. 25, December 2000, pp. 585-6. (Thanks to F.T. O'Rourke for
bringing this to our attention.)
HARD TO SQUARE
"Preferences in Quadrangles Reconsidered," H. Ohta, Perception,
vol. 28, 4, 1999; pp. 505-17.
A PRELIMINARY APPROACH
"Dating -- Purposes and Methods -- Some Preliminary Comments," M.
Vuagnat, Archives des Sciences, vol. 46, no. 2, 1993, pp. 145-146.
(Thanks to Wendy Cooper for bringing this to our attention.)
WARNING SOUNDS
"Repetitive Eructation as a Manifestation of Obsessive-Compulsive
Disorder," Stephen J. Zella, Douglas L. Geenens, and James N.
Horst, Psychosomatics, vol. 39, no. 3, May-June 1998, pp. 299-301.
(Thanks to Judith Baker for bringing this to our attention.) The
authors describe their patient thusly:
Reports the case of a 9-yr-old female who presented at
an outpatient psychiatric clinic with a chief complaint
of, "I'm afraid I'm going to throw up." This concern was
accompanied by high tension related to fear of
impending emesis, and was consistently followed by a
loud belch lasting 3-5 seconds, resulting in
partial, but significant, reduction in tension.
For a much more extensive list of citations, subscribe to AIR.
------------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-20 AIRhead Events
==> For details and updates see <http://www.improbable.com>
==> Want to host an event? <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> 617-491-4437.
SPRINGFIELD (MA) SYMPHONY SAT, FEB 10, 2001
8 pm. Symphony Hall, Court Street, Springfield.
World premiere of Jazz Harpist DEBORAH HENSON-CONANT's
full orchestral version of "Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening
Dress."
INFO: 413-733-2291, <http://www.masslive.com/sso/>
and also <http://www.hipharp.com> and
<http://www.improbable.com/news/2001/jan/lab-coats.html>
For map see <http://www.masslive.com/sso/direction.html>
STANFORD UNIVERSITY WED, FEB 14, 2001
7:30 pm.
Valentine's Day improbable research gala with:
<> AIR editor MARC ABRAHAMS
<> "How to Quantify Failure" author MARTIN J. MURPHY
<> "UFOs & Internal Combustion Engines" author SCOTT SANDFORD
<> "Postal Experiments" author JEFF VAN BUEREN
<> "Structured Procrastination" author JOHN PERRY
<> and other surpris(ing) personages
<> ...and, and, and... (probably!) a special performance of
songs from the Ig Nobel science mini-operas featuring
pianist Nicki Kerns and tenor/baritone Ahmed El-Gasseir
WHERE: This will most likely be at Tresidder Union, Oak West room,
which is on Teresa Street on the Stanford campus. A map is at
<http://www.stanford.edu/home/map/search_map.html>
* AS MINI-AIR GOES TO PRESS THERE IS A SLIGHT CHANCE THAT
* THIS EVENT WILL BE MOVED TO A DIFFERENT ROOM.
* IF SO, THAT WILL BE POSTED SEVERAL DAYS IN ADVANCE
* AT <http://www.improbable.com/navstrip/schedule.txt>
INFO: Michele Armstrong <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
650-723-1655
AAAS ANNUAL MEETING, SAN FRANCISCO FRI, FEB 16, 2001
SAN FRANCISCO HILTON HOTEL, Continental Ballroom 1, 8 pm.
AIR's annual session as part of the annual meeting of the American
Association for the Advancement of Science. Participants will
include:
<> AIR editor MARC ABRAHAMS
<> "How to Quantify Failure" author MARTIN J. MURPHY
<> "UFOs & Internal Combustion Engines" author SCOTT SANDFORD
<> "Postal Experiments" author JEFF VAN BUEREN
<> "Structured Procrastination" author JOHN PERRY
<> and other surpris(ing) personages
<> ...and, and, and... (probably!) a special performance of
songs from the Ig Nobel science mini-operas featuring
pianist Nicki Kerns and tenor/baritone Ahmed El-Gasseir
AAAS ANNUAL MEETING, SAN FRANCISCO MON, FEB 19, 2001
SPECIAL SPACIAL BONUS!
Special 1 minute AIR spectacular -- a performance of "The History
of the Universe in 100 Words or Less" -- at the beginning of the
Plenary Lecture. Be there on time -- 8:00 AM -- to see it.
SEE MEETING SCHEDULE FOR ROOM NUMBER
UC BERKELEY TUES, FEB 20, 2001
7 pm. 5634 Tolman Hall
AIR editor MARC ABRAHAMS and other AIRheads will appear, speak,
show fascinating things, and then disappear.
Sponsored by the Bay Area Skeptics.
INFO: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> 415 927-1548 <www.baskeptics.org>
WASHINGTON DC APR 20, 2001
Details TBA
SAS/ACS SPECIAL JOINT MEETING, PRINCETON, NJ DATE TBA
WEIZMANN INSTITUTE, ISRAEL WEEK OF MAY 13-18, 2001
Details TBA.
HEBREW UNIVERSITY OF JERUSALEM MAY 2001
Tentatively scheduled. Details TBA.
11th FIRST ANNUAL IG NOBEL PRIZE CEREMONY THURS, OCT 4, 2001
Sanders Theatre, Harvard University
--------------------------------------------------------------
2002-02-21 How to Subscribe to AIR (*)
Here's how to subscribe to the magnificent bi-monthly print
journal The Annals of Improbable Research (the real thing, not
just the little bits of overflow material you have been reading
here in mini-AIR).
...............................................................
Name:
Address:
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City and State:
Zip or postal code:
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Phone: FAX: E-mail:
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SUBSCRIPTIONS (6 issues per year):
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Overseas 1 yr/$41.95 US 2 yrs/$71.95 US
...............................................................
BACK ISSUES are available, too:
First issue: $8 USA, $11 Canada/Mex, $16 overseas Add'l issues
purchased at same time: $6 each
...............................................................
Send payment (US bank check, or international money order, or
Visa, Mastercard or Discover info) to:
Annals of Improbable Research (AIR)
PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA
617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927 <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
-----------------------------------------------------
2002-02-22 Our Address (*)
Annals of Improbable Research (AIR)
PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA
617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927
EDITORIAL: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
SUBSCRIPTIONS: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
WEB SITE: <http://www.improbable.com>
---------------------------
2002-02-23 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*)
Please distribute copies of mini-AIR (or excerpts!) wherever
appropriate. The only limitations are: A) Please indicate that the
material comes from mini-AIR. B) You may NOT distribute mini-AIR
for commercial purposes.
------------- mini-AIRheads -------------
EDITOR: Marc Abrahams ([EMAIL PROTECTED])
MINI-PROOFREADER AND PICKER OF NITS (before we introduce the last
few at the last moment): Wendy Mattson <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
WWW EDITOR/GLOBAL VILLAGE IDIOT: Amy Gorin
([EMAIL PROTECTED])
COMMUTATIVE EDITOR: Stanley Eigen ([EMAIL PROTECTED])
ASSOCIATIVE EDITOR: Mark Dionne
DISTRIBUTIVE EDITOR: Robin Pearce
CO-CONSPIRATORS: Gary Dryfoos, Ernest Ersatz, Craig Haggart, Nicki
Rohloff
MAITRE DE COMPUTATION: Jerry Lotto
AUTHORITY FIGURES: Nobel Laureates Dudley Herschbach, Sheldon
Glashow, William Lipscomb, Richard Roberts
(c) copyright 2001, Annals of Improbable Research
-----------------------------------------------------
2002-02-24 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*)
What you are reading right now is mini-AIR. Mini-AIR is a (free!)
tiny monthly *supplement* to the bi-monthly print magazine.
To subscribe, send a brief E-mail message to:
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
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SUBSCRIBE MINI-AIR MARIE CURIE
(You may substitute your own name for that of Madame Curie.)
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