I agree with you completely.:-)
--- Manoj [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Dear I,
one thing which nearly always works (an i hate to
say this) is mothers luv we wretched children a bit
too much and inspite of the child turning out to a
fucked up criminal, she does not act aka Nargis in
Mother India.
Chances of her severing ties are low .very
low. especially if our guy in question is the only
son and it is not a huge family kinda affair at his
end.
I believe there will hardly be any cases anyone
can say that their mothers threw them out of their
houses and severed ties when they came out to
thembrothers and fathers maybe (more becoz of
the male ego here) but mothers .. naw...hez
safe (sounds so bad and oppresive ... yes...but a
fact).
What normally does happen is that the mom,
believing it to be in the best interest of her son
from her point of view, will keep on coercing him to
change and try to get married (ek baar kaushish to
kar ke dekh le stuff), try a lot of emotional
blackmail (and they r the masters in this
anydayask daddy)
Not often has this led to the gay guy in question
succumbing and spending his life thinking yeh kya
kiyaa maine.
Hence counselling if any is needed by ur friend.
Naz (lajpat nagar) runs a phone helpline as well as
a counselling centre. he may drop in.
Better if he interacts with groups active in Delhi
where he can get to know people who have been
through these kinds of issues and know the pitfalls.
There is a good group (gays and lezs both) which
meets each sunday at Nehru park (NOT for cruising
inspite of the fame the place has) for just a
walk/jog.
The mom, in her luv and her belief for what is
right and best for her son, will really gain little
for any counselor per se.
The only help a mom can get and i say it from
experience. is if she gets to know that there
are other families which have similar kids and have
accepted them and the fact that her child is
thinking and working on SETTLING with a guy whi will
be there with him thru thick and thin
both these are beyond what u and a counselor can
provide for now so better work on the earlier part.
Rgds
Manoj
icarius_slade [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Hello friends,
Recently, one of my gay friends (who is in his early
thirties) came
out to his mother and, as is the situation in most
cases, the mother
has not taken to it kindlymy pal thinks that
worse-cum-worse,she
may even sever her ties with him, a thought which
shatters him as he
is very close to her. He does not have a father. He
doesn't have any
pillars of support in his immediate family or friend
circle who can
stand by his side.Even though my friend is putting
up a brave front,
I know that he requires assistance. Sitting in Bby,
i can't do
anything, but for just being by his side on the
phone as much as i
can.
In view of the foregoing, can anyone please give me
the names
contact details of some good counsellors in Delhi
(preferably south
delhi), who'd be able to counsel the mother-son duo?
More then the
son, the mother requires it, from whatever i could
gather, to get to
terms with this revelation
Thanks in advance to everyone.
Regards,
I
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