Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I think we agree more than we realize, lol. I certainly can't condemn those who have been mentally drained from years of trying to dig themselves out of a seemingly bottomless hole. Unequal access to resources is arguably the biggest difficulty of life, and if you, like several of us on this very thread, have been predisposed to having access to the things that made us relatively successful, things aren't so bad. Sure, we might encounter the occasional financial aid hiccup, not have a book in an accessible format at the exact time we want it, but generally speaking, we (those of us who went to/are attending college) make ends meet. But I've observed blind people who have put forth effort and applied to jobs, gotten interviews, and face nothing but doors in their faces. I have no doubt that if they were given an opportunity to work even at a call center, they'd take it. It's almost heartbreaking to see people get excited over receiving a job offer in that particular industry, not because the work isn't great (work is work, after all), but because it's indicative of the struggle minority groups face.College isn't for everybody, either. Lots of people are often times discouraged from taking STEM-related majors because of math requirements. (I know kaigoku would appreciate this) Having access to the necessary tools for learning is of the utmost importance when taking courses with relatively higher levels of visual material. Blindness aside, calculus can be a tricky thing to grasp at first. Sighted people struggle with this sort of stuff, too. Add blindness on top of that, and suddenly you have a whole different tiger to wrestle with. Unfortunately, it also comes down to the university and it's ability to draft quality instructors, both at the professor and TA levels. I struck gold this semester when my calc TA would spend literally 3-5 hours a week going over material. He would draw on the APH Draftsman board and physically show me things to make sense of the concepts. Quality instruction and help is still rather rare, so it's not entirely shocking or blameworthy for blind people to be deterred from taking even a single finite algebra gen ed requirement. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432696/#p432696 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... Blind people struggle to ask forvn help, so trying all options is difficult. We need to learn how to ask for help URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432690/#p432690 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I just want to clarify that I certainly don't advocate for giving up. I certainly hope that everyone is as hopeful and willing to absolutely do everything in their power to make things happen for them, especially when times get tough. I am simply saying that some people are not so mentally strong so as to pursue viable solutions. My only agreement with post 6 was that it is easier said than done. Also, I believe my stance is actually neutral as well. My aim was only to highlight the possibilities that do exist: The possibility that a lack of motivation is crippling. And perhaps I exaggerated a bit when I wrote the bit about "happy endings". Certainly, a happy ending is very subjective, and was also a stretch. Just a few things I wanted to clarify. haha URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432688/#p432688 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... Post 6 was not intended to be used as a give up and give in idea. I've had my fair share of success amongst sighted individuals. I attended mainstream school, got along in classes with other sighted individuals where I was the only blind one, was voted most talented and most likely to succeed student of my senior year, graduated with honors, participated in orchestra and wrestling, helped raise awareness for environmental protection and appreciation, have contributed thousands of hours of voluntary community services throughout south Texas, have met famous people, have been offered awesome record label deals and have been privileged with the honor of being in the same room with a former president of the United states.Beyond these I've ridden bikes alongside sighted friends, gone to the park with sighted friends, gone bowling with sighted friends, gone to the movies with sighted friends, made most of my life, in fact, alongside sighted individuals. The fact is that I do not advocate for wallowing in self-pity anymore than I suggest you participate in the opposite human error of self-assurance. Both are arrogant, the former by placing a complete damper over what you can do, the latter, limiting you to yourself as the only means by which right judgments can be obtained. In the end, only a fool listens to himself or herself a hundred percent of the time and forgets the advice of others.The intent of post 6 is to outline the difficulty of the balancing act an individual of any minority has to partake in. I could sit here all day and say that I'm blind, I'm deaf, I'm poor, I'm Hispanic, I'm Mexican... I'm a super super super minority or something! I should just let everyone walk all over me because it'll never work out! Shame on me for daring to get married, have children, move out of my parents' home, even!Or I can engage in the opposite extreme and say, screw everyone! Most of them are sheeple anyway who don't have any clue! At least half of them sit around waiting for TV and other multi-media platforms to tell them how life is supposed to be lived and what they're supposed to think about it, while the other half listens to the first half. When they're not agreeing, they're just fighting about it, lashing out at each other on social media platforms and thinking up the most childish insults to hurl at each other. Me? I'm not wasting time. when tragedy hit, I got married. When storms came, I buckled down and worked harder and managed to stay alive. When I lost a chunk of my hearing, I depended on noone to help me any further! I pull through! I make it happen! I am what I am no matter who wants me to be what or where they are or how they feel about it.Because we're all people with emotions, thoughts, ideas, opinions and different personalities, it really is necessary to stay in the middle. I sympathize with those who feel depressed... I had two sighted girls tell me they would never date a blind individual. It hurt! I had one girl who was both sighted and a year older than me flat out give me the cold shoulder, no matter how much of a gentleman I tried to be! Ow! I had one girl dump me for a sighted guy and another who told me she liked me just so she could find out how I felt about her, then told me that she wouldn't date me because her mommy would have a fit! Yaaa!Still not genuinely convinced that I'm part of your camp? I was performing at a party and was told by an irate invitee I really shouldn't be there begging for attention like some pitiful puppy, told at a festival that I would never make it anywhere because I was more interested in helping people escape their problems instead of shooting for the stars, told at a traveling carnaval that I couldn't ride some rollercoster or another because I was blind, told by a Burger King manager that I should be thankful I could even order a meal rather than asking if they had braille menus. So yes, I've been there, and I'm here to tell you that it hurts! It really hurts! Much like @leibylucw I wonder just what kind of person I'm going to get the next time I ride in an Uber, how it'll go if I take my family to a McDonalds, what might happen when my son goes to first grade this coming school year and we need to ask the teacher to make his homework accessible by some means so that we can help him with it.What most sighted people won't tell you is that even they are interdependent on one another. Men hate asking for directions; women hate accepting directions. It's part of who and how we are, but deep down inside we all want and need each other's help at some point or another. To the antisocialite who claims they can get along without people? I have a name for ya... Ted Kaczynski. He needed people but chose to ignore it, thinking that by doing all he did he was the true representation of the self-made-man, fully ignoring that in all that he did he still craved the attention
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... @15, I take your points. Truth be told, having been denied by Uber drivers time and time again because of my guide dog, it started taking it's toll some time ago. Why can't I get from Point A to Point B without having to find a decent driver? Heaven forbid I have an important meeting to go to, and I can't make it on time because of the bastard nature of people. Obviously, this doesn't yield nearly as much of a significant consequence as people who are denied by employers, but I do understand the overarching concept of people's sparks being extinguished as a result of consistent discrimination.I am in no way of the belief that expending all options will guarantee a happy ending. Life is full of not-so-happy endings, but I think where we're diverging is from the point at which we say people deal with these things not out of their own laziness (although it can happen, sometimes as a result of being beaten down or just being plain naturally unmotivated), but due to the assholery of those who control some form of power. I take no issue with most of your previous points, and I personally think "It reduces someone to not even wanting to try any of the possible solutions that might exist" illustrates your point well, but despite how we feel, there might be things to be done. If it just so turns out that all options have been spent, and no progress has been made, then I truthfully can't expect someone to move on. I guess my point is to give regard to those options, but truly give regard, not just say "all options have been spent."A girl on my Facebook is blind. She tried attending college, but it didn't work out for her. I don't know the reason(s) why. She made a post some time ago complaining that the voc-rehab services helping her out was going to no longer fund her tuition because she had a 1.9 GPA. She was horribly distraught because she felt she couldn't get out of that hole unless they helped continually paying. This is up for debate, but my line of thinking is akin to what I've described in this thread. Has she expended all of her options? Did she go through the necessary channels to get the right accommodations for classes? If she did, was the DSo sub-par and didn't do their job right? That happens far too often, so it wouldn't shock me in the slightest. Did she have difficulties understanding the materials? Did she go to the professors, TA's, learning center, other support services for help? I don't know the answers to these questions, so I can't conclude anything, but if the answer to these questions are no, then I don't feel her argument that voc-rehab is doing her wrong because they won't fund her tuition is legitamit, seeing as how she didn't expend those options. If the answers to those questions were yes, however, then that really sucks and voc-rehab should help her find something more suitable for her to be successful. That's kind of why they exist...And, if voc-rehab didn't help her at all, what else can be done? Virtually nothing. To that I'd say I'm sorry and completely sympathize, assuming the narrative was such that she did everything she could.Regarding people not having the motivation to expend available options, I can understand the reasoning for their lack of motivation. They're systematically discriminated against, told no, all the things we've nailed on this thread. If there are options or opportunities to pursue but the person is unmotivated to pursue them, I have some sympathy of course, because there is something to be said about what they've been through. The next step is getting that person to take the leap and expend those opportunities. That's the real issue here, as you've mentioned. It's unfortunate people can't get to that point, but I never discount pointing out those possibilities in the name of their distress.I think that's about as far as I think I can go without going into more case scenarios, but wanted to write one final response to your points. That being said, I understand your perspective, and will respectfully agree to disagree. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432558/#p432558 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... @13, I can see we're just going to have to agree to disagree. I understood your original point, and hence, I still stand by my response in post 11. I hesitate to engage in what is considered a "circular argument," but I do indeed still challenge that it is very easy for someone to say that someone should move on. Perhaps this conversation could be had even in general terms by saying that a lack of motivation affects even those without a disability. The fact of the matter is, people with any characteristic that does not fall in the favor of a particular individual has the potential to extend to an unfavorable outlook by a group as a whole. This has happened numerous of times throughout history. In most cases, people gave up hope, until there was one or a few individuals who decided to take a stand! This was even with the emotional support of others. You might say that this is an extreme, but isn't that what we're going for here? Those who gave up were not able to experience the rewards as a result of others' efforts, those of which belonged to the same unaccepted group. Sometimes, you can exhaust all of your options, and still not yield any results, making it hard to "move on". Not being motivated is a powerful thing. It reduces someone to not even wanting to try any of the possible solutions that might exist. Just as a full disclosure, I consider myself to be very lucky. I too obtained an education, had really good jobs, and I have yet to face any form of discrimination. But I have seen it time and time again in our community, and in others, and the results of what it can do to people! This is all to say that I don't quite agree with the idea that there is a happy ending for everyone. And it is very unfortunate. I understand you touched on the points in this post in a reasonable and formal manner, but again, I argue that you really don't know what it's like until you go through it yourself. Again, you in the general sense! URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432520/#p432520 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I think a lot depends on personality of the blind person which may lead to liking or disliking.For instance, while I was able to make some good friends in the last two years of the university, my best friend who is blind and who studies at another university can't seem to get settled and find some good friends to hang out with. He is experiencing stress and has started disliking everything he does in his daily life. He actually refused three good posts he was offered at university: president/dean of students, student counciler, and head of a social club. Everything happened due to his stressful situation. There is another very good friend of mine who is blind and studied psychology at university. He has had the best time at university, although he was 5 or 6 years older than his classmates in average. He even got an honorary degree from his faculty.Then comes the luck factor which may overcome every good or bad personality trait. Some people are just lucky in some situations like finding a good partner, finding good friends or coworkers, and why not, finding a good job.If I had to talk about myself, I could also say that I was lucky in many cases. First of, I was very lucky to have an always supporting family who urged me to study a discipline no blind person ever did in my country. I majored in English Language and Culture and got a good degree in the end. Everybody was afraid to choose this major because none of them had any form of support which would enable them to successfully participate in seminars and lectures. Before I enrolled at university, every blind student whom I met told me I couldn't make it and I would quickly drop university. It was my family's support which kept me going for three years and now onto the masters. Last October, I read the news section at my university's website, saying that three scholarships were offered by a university in Germany. I applied and was accepted by the hosting university in the end of December. Today, I am the only blind person who studies abroad through Erasmus Plus program, and the first one to have ever had.I mentioned all of these, not because I want to show off or take pride in what I have achieved; in fact, I find pride something totally insignificant as life is a series of steps that when you reach the next step, the pride you have taken in the previous step(s) seems completely valueless. And so, I mentioned all of these because not all the blind students from my community have had the support I enjoyed throughout my life. I know I haven't been the hardest working person of all as I know of a friend who still uses braille at university while I enjoy typing in Microsoft Word. It's because I was perhaps very very lucky to have had all psychological, social and material support in a rundown country like Albania which can offer blind people nothing. In fact, I've said it: "being Albanian and blind is an inexorable curse." URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432491/#p432491 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I can't discredit any of the aforementioned points and perspectives, and suffice it to say this is a circular argument when I say "it's easy for you to say it's easy for me to say to move on." I've had my luck in life, and it is quite unfortunate not everybody gets to have that. That, however, doesn't nullify the position I take based on my life's experiences. This is one of the biggest difficulties of life -- realizing both sides and trying to reach a balance, especially when it comes to what people have experienced. I recognize there are blind people who have endured quite the rough lifestyle, between being bullied and being told no by the umpteenth million employer. But what then do we do about those who have suffered or are suffering as a result of others' being dastardly humans? Do we say, "That sucks, but don't just tell them to move on?" Do we just let things go and leave it at the understanding that their situation sucks? There aren't any readily-available solutions that we can just implement overnight, that's how life is, sadly.Let's define "move on" as something a little more meaningful. When blind people are subjugated by discriminatory boundaries, it is completely understandable that consistent denial of opportunities would eventually render them weary and unmotivated. By "move on," I don't mean "cheer up! Things aren't so bad." No, I subscribe to the "Okay, that really sucks and I'm sorry you went through that. Let's explore other options" mentality. That's what I mean by "move on." I think post 9 illustrated another version of the former connotation, but I'm using "moving on" in a way that helps one proceed forward while not disregarding the hardships they have faced. Those hardships play a significant role in someone's mental health and motivation, so paying no regard would be both insensitive and counterproductive.Maybe those of us who have been lucky were afforded an opportunity that is obtainable, but was conveniently placed before us on a silver platter. Perhaps going to college for us was as easy as sitting in our underwear one morning and submitting an application from the comfort of our bed (and yes, I have done this, I have no shame). College is ctill widely considered a luxury, so it's not unbelievable to me that most people haven't considered it an option. The more daunting part of college is the obvious financing the cost. Financial aid exists, and so do scholarships. You'd be surprised just how much money is out there to fund college tuition. This gets into the heart of socioeconomic status, but the point here is that instead of saying no and assuming it's not possible to have these opportunities, why don't we explore, discuss, ask questions, do what we can to obtain something worth-while? All too many times when people vent about how things don't work out for them, I ask follow-up questions.Did you get that application fee waived?: NoDid you know you could get that application fee waived?: NoDid you search and apply for grants, scholarships, loans, etc?: No...So many different things to explore, and people's potential and chance of happiness are swept under the rug because they weren't shown which questions to ask or who to ask them. My goal is to expend quite literally every single damned option.So to clarify my original post, "move on" isn't "cheer up!" Rather, it's "Sorry you went through that, let's find other ways to help you out." That was my mistake for not making that clear. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432467/#p432467 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... 11. I disagree about blindness being more recognized than other disabilities, at least within my bubble. I see all sorts of down syndrome awareness, autism awareness, CP awareness, even Elhers Danlos awareness, and the only blindness stuff I see are posted by other blind people. When you hear things in the news about disability rights, it is almost always autism. The only group who I see less of than blind people are deaf people.That being said, you are right about employment. They can wrap it up in reasons all they want, but I can almost guarantee half, if not more, of my interviews, to get a teaching job, I was turned down because I was blind. I know it isn't my interview skills because any time I have gone for a job in my current field and had an interview, I have been made an offer except when they didn't want a male, but that's a whole different story. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432430/#p432430 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I agree with post 6. It is certainly a lot easier said than done. What if you go in for an interview, and the interviewer just doesn't like you because your blind, and deems you unfit for the job. Yeah. You can move on, but you would definitely become discouraged. After so many rejections, people will tend to give up. There are a crap load of discrinination laws and all that in the US. It doesn't mean that an interviewer can use social engineering to disqualify you on the spot. I'm telling you, it's a cruel world out there. Some of us have it easier than others because we pick a path that is just plain suitable for the visually impaired. I'm not saying that effort has no role in our ultimate placement, but you'd be crazy to think that moving on is just as simple for others as it might be for you. I'm saying you in the general sense. We definitely have more of an option when selecting our friends. I can assure you, however, that there is an unspoken state that involves proving yourself to the person with whom you are trying to form a relationship (friendship or romantic), provided that the other person has no "disabilities" and/or other characteristics that would qualify them as standing out. Ultimately, each of us know how much we can handle. And let me tell you, blindness is one of the disabilities that is more recognized. Can you imagine how people with other disabilities might feel in the face of lack of acceptance? I really enjoy this discussion. I just don't quite agree with the original point. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432421/#p432421 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... @7 can you give some examples of how blindness has taught problen solving and alternate thinking? I am asking so I can focus on this concept more. I suck at problem solving, so it would help a lot. I know finding a way around something inaccessible is problem solving, but what else about blindness? URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432403/#p432403 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... Unfortunately the world is a cruel place. so if somebody decides not to like you due to their personal preference they are not worth wasting your time on.The quicker the person realises this the better off they are.There are plenty of people you're going to come across in your lifetime that will like or love you for you.focus on the small positive things in life and keep your head up. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432398/#p432398 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I agree 100% with Dark and Ironcross. If people can't get past the "but you're blind" aspect, move along. Most of the human race is in "bastardy mode" as Dark put it so eloquently. I like that!Of course, you'll get lucky and find the few people in your life that really matter and look at you for the person you are. I don't want or need many shallow relationships with people that may leave at any time. I'm perfectly happy having one or two people I can truly connect with. Then again, I never have and probably never will, crave constant social attention, so it doesn't bother me too much. I don't mind meeting new people, but I can usually tell if I'm interested after about 5 or 10 minutes of conversation. People who are willing to learn new ideas and change their initial impressions about blindness and other disabilities are great!So in summary, seek out the fantastic people and leave all the assholes and bastards behind. You'll be much happier when you do that. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432296/#p432296 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... Count me in the category of lucky ones. It's only but on a rare occasion I've dealt with moronic humans who don't accept me or my blindness. I take your point, Dark, that "doesn't like" is a pretty vague choice of words.When consequences are to be paid (or if we believe there should be), it makes things far more difficult. Take this highly controversial stance taken by Lyft that says they are considered "a technology company and not a transportation company, therefore, they are not legally obligated to follow the Americans with Disabilities Act in the States." This obviously has significant effects on peoples with disabilities, not just us blindies, and will turn a few heads. Had this been a blindness-only issue, perhaps it wouldn't have even made headlines. In any event, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I get where you're coming from on the whole "unrecognized minority" thing.Even locally here in the state of Pennsylvania, we are facing issues surrounding the merging of vocational rehabilitation services that would blend blindness-related services in with the mix of everything else. We barely get the services we need (depending on where you are in the state) as is, and this merge caters to the overwhelming majority. That is, peoples with disabilities who are not blind.This whole blindness thing gets to be such a pain in the ass. Blindness has been very inconvenient; however, it has taught me the value of problem-solving and alternative thinking. That being said, though, I can't help but feel my life would have been at least slightly more fulfilling if not for better human interaction. The problem with this "getting down on myself" way of thinking is that just because I'd have had my sight since birth doesn't mean I'd grow up to make the same decisions in life -- joining choirs, being friends with the people I've made friends with, going to college where I attend now and pursuing computer science -- what if I turned to substance abuse? What if I had gotten caught up in the wrong crowd? (the sad truth is that I almost did, but my blindness was an obstacle because I couldn't run around town at age 12). It's hard maintaining the balance of "I hate the inconveniences of being blind" and the "blindness has taught me a lot in life" things.That point was far more tangential than I intended, but felt it was somewhat pertinent to the original post. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432295/#p432295 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... It sounds as easy as pie when you say it; person B doesn't like you because you're person A and you're blind. You can't help it, so move along. The problem is that, unless you have no sense of worth at all, getting past the pain is not as easy as just saying it away. It's going to hurt if only a little. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432227/#p432227 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... Hello folks. Well, often my religious beliefs, point of view and personal tastes are considered "different" from the standard. There's also the fact that I'm totally blind. But I've seen bad apples coming from both sides of the basket. Blind people judging the sighted way of life, and sighted people ignoring or acting like they're in a zoo, watching the interesting beings doing their things, and sometimes interacting to keep the wheel spinning. I've learned to not hold expectations about things and people in general, so I can be happy when things are positive, and completely neutral when people around me are being idiots. I know 3 or 4 people in my life that I can truely call friends, they are around for about 15 years or so, and I know I can count on them.Best regards, Haramir. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432201/#p432201 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... The problem leibylucw, is your qualify "doesn't like" covers a hole multitude of sins (often literally), some of which are more or less reprehensible than others. For example, if your in a group of people, who accept you and you have a friend or two, well that one person who ignores your existance or tries to snub you is easy to pass over since hay, you've met your friends and have your decent people so sod the idiots! What do you do though, when you go to a new social group/group of people and have to sit around for hours because nobody wants to speak to you, or can never get people beyond the "weird blind person" syndrome. What do you do if your trying to get served in a shop and the cashier just flat out ignores you, or when your fired from your job on a flimsy excuse which doesn't have to do with blindness honest gov.And what do you do on those occasions you actually do run into someone who is malicious or actively abusive, since yes, it does happen even if most people want to ignore that too.If your in a social situation where your liable to run into people who will treat you like a human being, then yeah, its pretty easy to skim past the scub bags, however in my experience those sorts of situations are rare inddeed. The most common reaction I tend to observe myself, is that people simply ignore your existence, often en mass, which makes making new friends, or heck sometimes even basic jobs like shopping bloody difficult.There isn't anything you can do about this, because unfortunately blindness is still the unrecognised minority, and while these days if someone of a given religion/race/gender, or heck even someone in a wheel chair were treated that way there would be hell to pay, unfortunately disability rights campaigners tend to forget blind people exist. Bottom line, people are bastards only interested in themselves! If you happen to find people who are not bastards, count yourself lucky, but don't expect too much because selfish bastardy is the base state of humanity, so the best you can do is tell humanity to fuck off and try to make the best of it on your own, since that's pretty much where you'll be, unless your very, very lucky. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432195/#p432195 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... The problem leibylucw, is your qualify "doesn't like" covers a hole multitude of sins (often literally), some of which are more or less reprehensible than others. For example, if your in a large group of people, and you have a friend or two, well that one person who ignores your existance or tries to snub you is easy to pass over since hay, you've met your friends and have your decent people. What do you do though, when you go to a new social group/group of people and have to sit around for hours because nobody wants to speak to you, or can never get people beyond the "weird blind person" syndrome. What do you do if your trying to get served in a shop and the cashier just flat out ignores you, or when your fired from your job on a flimsy excuse which doesn't have to do with blindness honest gov.And what do you do on those occasions you actually do run into someone who is malicious or actively abusive, since yes, it does happen. If your in a social situation where your liable to run into people who will treat you like a human being, then yeah, its pretty easy to skim past the scub bags, however in my experience those sorts of situations are rare inddeed. The most common reaction I tend to observe myself, is that people simply ignore your existence, often en mass, which makes making new friends, or heck sometimes even basic jobs like shopping bloody difficult.There isn't anything you can do about this, because unfortunately blindness is still the unrecognized minority, and while these days if someone of a given religion/race/gender, or heck even someone in a wheel chair were treated that way there would be hell to pay, unfortunately disability rights campaigners tend to forget blind people exist. Bottom line, people are bastards only interested in themselves! If you happen to find people who are not bastards, count yourself lucky, but don't expect too much because selfish bastardy is the base state of humanity, so the best you can do is tell humanity to fuck off and try to make the best of it on your own, since that's pretty much where you'll be, unless your very, very lucky. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432195/#p432195 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I hate it when someone doesn't talk or like a blind person because they are blind.But that same person if you tell her/him that is fat thats it you crossed the line.You make her/him feel bad but how the blind person feels when a sighted person treats the same way a blind person.Maybe this will sound harsh but i rather have blind friends then sighted ones.With a blind person i can talk share stories etc.If its possible i can be friends with a sighted person too but if that person starts to treath me different because im blind then no thanks.I dont know if i get the point across. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432194/#p432194 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind...
Re: They don't like me because I'm blind... I would say if someone doesn't like you because you're blind, they haven't taken the time to get to know you enough to make that decision based off merit, and it is instead based off some ignorance, fear, or notion. If that happens, that person isn't worth wasting any more time with, because they've made up their mind about you in short order, time to move on. URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432056/#p432056 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
They don't like me because I'm blind...
They don't like me because I'm blind... Person A is blind. Person B is sighted. Person A is upset because Person B doesn't like Person A because Person A is blind. Person A goes onto say that they wish they were sighted so they could have more friends or be more welcomed among others, or, at the very least, be friends with Person B.I've heard some form of this frequently over the years. I've been rattling it around in my head for so long now. About three years ago, I've been lead to this question: if somebody doesn't like you because you're blind, are they an indecent human being? Is their disapproval of your blindness indicative of a general lack of compassion and closed-mindedness?This is where the conversation gets fun. Blindness can be a tricky thing when discussing interactions with sighted people. I also believe it depends on the paradigm of the relationship. Friendship and romantic intimacy are two completely different subtypes of relationships, and I feel that eye contact, or lackthereof in our case, can be a big obstacle for some people when it comes to intimacy. So what? Big whoop, it's just eye contact...Well, as it turns out, people like what they like and need what they need. Many would argue that because blindness isn't something within our control, we shouldn't be judged for it. Sadly, the inevitable truth is that we are.But more to the point, what if you were of a particular race Person B didn't like? What if you practiced a religion that Person B didn't like? What if you just exhibited some type of behavior or were of some undesirably physical body type Person B didn't like? What this comes down to is "hey, if that person doesn't like you, move along and find people who do." Blindness, race, physical traits, etc, they're all the same.It seems to me that disabilities are often thought of as exclusive to this concept, probably due to the "out of my control" thing. Perhaps it's also impart from the mentality that peoples with disabilities are fragile, hypersensitive, etc.I suppose my answer to the question of "are they assholes because they don't like the fact my eyeballs don't work" is, don't bother answering this question. Ultimately, it doesn't matter what kind of person Person B is on a general level. Person B doesn't like you for one reason or another, and you shouldn't waste your time worrying about them. There's nearly 8 billion people in this world, and we are sure to find at least ONE person who will be our friend.Now hold on, shouldn't we at least try to help the Person B's of the world by reasoning to them why the Person A's of the world are cool and could be good friends? To each their own. I've had my fair share of ignorant sighted people in the nace of my blindness, and have found that there's a difference between being ignorant and being uneducated. The difference is that the uneducated folks don't want to offend you, and the ignorant ones don't care if they offend you. My point here is that those who are ignorant, standoffish, or just plain indecent human beings are not the types of people I want in my life. It doesn't make sense to me that somebody can be a generally good person and highly stubborn about changing their mind about the way they view a person or group of people. This can open up a whole different can of worms, though...Let's say Person B is generally accepting of others lifestyles, traits, etc. What if Person B straight up didn't like blind people? What if Person B got joy out of tripping Person A on the sidewalk? Moral dilemmas often lead to people taking sides since there are no right or wrong answers. Take Captain America: Civil War as a prime example. Do we hold Person B accountable in general for their treatment of blind people, or, because it's just blind people, we take the utilitarian perspective and let it slip because it's only this one thing Person B disapproves of.Where do you stand on this topic? URL: https://forum.audiogames.net/post/432052/#p432052 -- Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
